Since most readers on here are above the age of ten, you may or may not be aware of Club Penguin, a children’s website which I admittedly visit once or twice a fortnight to mess around on. Nonetheless, Club Penguin feels lacking in something, and so it seems to me that we must update it for the anime and gaming generation, with an all-new spin on it entitled Club Prinny. On Club Prinny, one must input a number of sins in order to generate a damned soul, which is then sewn into a prinny. After customising your prinny, you can wander around the Netherworld performing tasks to atone for your sins, and generally serving Laharl and Etna. Special events include payday (once a year) and the night of the red moon, where prinnies who have atoned for their sins can finally leave the site.

So don’t delay, play the simulation of eternal servitude for the souls of the damned today!

Kaiji 4

“HARD GAY will be revolutionised!”

“Oh no, my fantasy is turning into a tentacle rape nightmare!”

“…and yet I’m starting to feel strangely aroused.”

“That means we’re compatible!”

Random Thoughts: Zetta

This week we interview the most badass Overlord in the entire cosmos- Zetta! So, Zetta, are you really as badass as you claim, or is it all just a smokescreen?

Of course I’m that badass! Don’t ask me those kinds of questions unless you’re ready to go a few rounds and find out.

How did your career and life opportunities change once you got turned into a book? Did you have to turn over a new leaf?

Look, I’m sick of the book jokes already, okay? Yeah, being in this form isn’t ideal, but don’t think that I’m out of the game because of it. Everyone has minor setbacks, but strong people like me can easily overcome them.

Does it annoy you that you have to rely on low level battle monkeys whilst you sit on the field as a motionless book?

Part of me would love to get up close and personal with the enemy, but then again, you don’t spend years clawing your way up the ladder just to keep doing everything yourself. There’s no point having underlings if you don’t delegate the day to day work to them.

And finally, which is better- love or power?

Power, you idiot! Love is for losers.

This Week in Anime

“Look, oranges, I hate to say this, but I just don’t think our relationship is working out.”

What would life be without Pizza Hut?

“Ouch- why did you have to kick me there?”

“Take me now! I don’t care that we’re in public!”

“I will now teach you survival- Ray Mears style!”

“Tell the truth- you just hid that behind the bush earlier, didn’t you?”

“I support grapes and the revolution!”

“This fruit is not for the likes of you!—

“Oh well, I’ll make do with walnuts- they’re everywhere anyway.”

Anime World Tour: Utawarerumono

Welcome to a pastoral future of furries, simple living, gods and monsters! If you like the idea of a harem of cat, dog and foxgirls, then this is the place for you, and whilst the constant political turmoil across the continent may seem off-putting, it does ensure that you can go from nothing to owning your own country within a matter of weeks. So put your plans of conquest to the test and net yourself your own castle filled with beautiful girls- but beware of continual attack from unstable dictators!

Amusing Search Terms

women in tears anime: You beast, wanting to see women cry.

unusual pleasuring methods: Ah, you’ve come to the right place for everything from DOG to PILLAR.

azure rare playmate: Who doesn’t want a playmate?

Mai HiME doujin H-game: Sorry, my game is all-ages.

punyu movie: What is this?

anime bad angel: Bad angel- naughty!

realistic naruto: Naruto is highly realistic, isn’t it?

anime girL FROM OUTER SPACE: she’s from OUTER SPACE, I tell you!

Amusing Spam

“Instant Payday Loan…

>From what I can tell public policy managers who reside in Waterbury whimsically applaud cash advances…”

How utterly whimsical of them.

“amateur housewife…

I really do not understand why you are so on you”re point….”

Sorry, but I just have to make my point before I’m satisfied.

“free magic coin tricks…

Have heard from it before, but is indeed a very good comment. Thanks….”

Glad I could help with your free magic coin tricks.

“amateur wife…

..”

This whole business is filled with amateurs! Let’s see some professional wives.

The news that Clannad’s widescreen version would not premiere until a month after its 4×3 showing has angered many, and by looking at the screencap above, we can see why- no one wants to miss out on views of desks and classroom windows. That being said, let’s just imagine what sort of delights might be available in those hidden sections.

• Gratuitous fanservice.
• Hidden anime-only characters!
• Snipers trying to pick off the main characters.
• Fat cats.
• Papillon in a thong.

Kaiji rips off Yu-Gi-Oh! For shame!

It has come to our attention that the gambling anime Kaiji, which just started airing, is not as original as it seems- it is actually a rip-off of Yu-Gi-Oh! Let’s parody the first two episodes whilst we look at the evidence.

Hey, what’s my laptop doing on here?

He does have a point…

“I’ll tell you what I want- what I really, really want.”

On Kaiji, Kaiji is forced to go on a mysterious ship in order to erase his debts, whilst in the first arc of Yu-Gi-Oh, Yugi took a mysterious ship to Duellist Island to get his grandfather’s soul back.

Admittedly, in Yu-Gi-Oh the ship was floating through the depths of heck.

Wait, isn’t that a Nippon Ichi SRPG spell for curing status effects?

Any excuse to frisk a fit male body.

“Listen very carefully, I will say this only once.”

These stars greatly resemble the star chips used on Duellist Island.

They’re even playing card games to win stars!

“But- but Yu-Gi-Oh is all about the power of friendship!”

Yep, this is definitely just like Yu-Gi-Oh.

Random Thoughts: Furude Rika\r\nThis week, we interview Furude Rika from Higurashi, and spoilers will most certainly be involved! So, Rika, what was it like living the same events over and over again?

Incredibly boring, if it must be known, and of course getting killed over and over isn’t nice. When I took this job, I had no idea how repetitive it was going to be, but at least it’s made me famous.

Does it ever disturb you that technically you’re an ancient person stuck in the body of a child?

Of course it does- I want to grow up, damn it!

All your friends got to go on killing sprees- didn’t you ever wish that you could do the same to relieve the stress?

Many times, but then I realised that everything would just reset once I was done.

Don’t you think “Himanizawa Syndrome” is a bit ridiculous?

Don’t even ask me to defend the writers on that one.

And finally, how do you really feel about Satoko?

Don’t get me started- I have never met a character more annoying in both her happy and miserable arcs. If you must know, I was the one who secretly encouraged the town to hate her, and when I was pretending to be her friend, I was really just isolating her from everyone else.

This Week in Anime

It’s like every series has to have a bartender these days.

Mmm…strawberries.

I never knew I had my own bar…

Oranges are evolving personalities of their own.

Even so, it isn’t helping them to win the war.

Anime World Tour: Akagi

Welcome to a world filled to the brim with GAR and MANLINESS, so much so that even women would grow a pair if they entered it. In this yakuza-dominated world, the main (and indeed only) pastime to indulge in is mah-jongg, and for those of you who have already mastered the normal game, fear not, for there are all sorts of crooked and fixed matches to participate in. Whether you fancy trying to outsmart your opponent with glass tiles, bet your own lifeblood on a match, or just switch their hand when they aren’t looking, we have every variation of mah

In Your Reflection

This week we have a head-to-head between two quiet young women- Maggie from R.O.D. the TV and Sakaki from Azumanga Daioh. Both are good-natured yet somewhat introverted, and totally committed to their most beloved pastime (books for Maggie, cute things for Sakaki).

Amusing Search Terms

This week, a misguided but conservation-minded internet user asks “Are Wolves Going Extinct?”. A question worth looking into, indeed, but other people have more pressing queries, such as “Is Koutetsu Sangokushi Gay?”.

Old favourites: Romance of the Three Kingdoms Goes Hentai

Full moon wo sagashite animated banners: not here, sorry.

The samaga com: Am I stupid for completely failing to grasp what this is?

ANIME BABY ANIME: yeah baby, anime!

good charm school witch storys: might as well fit everything you want into one anime.

“Ikkitousen ” NAKED: I love the way “naked” is capitalised to add emphasis.

what Mercutio looked like from Romeo and: Who’s Mercutio again? …(yeah, that was irony- it’s like goldy and bronzy, only made of iron).

harvest moon were is the gods drop: Er, don’t look at me.

anime(dreams vs. reality): I dream of the perfect anime…

I have seen the end and no one survived,: oh noes! The end is nigh!

Amusing Spam

“Jessie…

I”m going to look into this and let you know what I find….”

Good for you.

“PianoKawai…

…”

How cute…a piano.

“libido for women…

It is wearisome striving to compute the hours we”ve invested searching for libido articles….”

And sometimes, spam just makes me laugh.

Dancing: the SJ way

Shounen Jump has covered everything from Go to tennis, but there’s one area it has yet to cover- the world of ballroom dancing. Fortunately, here at Tuesday Rumble we’ve got the situation covered, with a brand new series entitled Dance Off! Here’s a run down of what you can expect from the thrills and spills of the Dance Off world.

Misaki Shirou has never danced a step before in her life, but when her parents take her to a professional performance, she gets the dancing bug! Determined to become a professional herself, Misaki starts attending classes, but the road ahead will be tough.

Story arcs

• Misaki attends her very first lesson, but to her disappointment, she seems to have two left feet- she even falls over in front of all her classmates! Will she ever find a partner when she can’t even stand up straight?
• Through destined power, Misaki has magically mastered all the basic steps, and she longs to move up to the intermediate class- but her teacher will only let her if she can win the amateur dance competition. Cue a tournament arc as Misaki and her partner Koji try to put together their best ballroom routines.
• When Misaki’s progress astounds everyone, she finds herself leaving Kouji behind- and with no other partners available, she might have to hang up her dancing shoes for good. Hope comes in the form of another dancer looking for a partner- until Misaki learns that it is another woman! In a desperate attempt to keep competing, Misaki cuts her hair, dons a tail suit and learns the men’s steps so that she can partner this new girl.
• Disaster strikes when Misaki’s cross-dressing secret is discovered and her first place title is stripped from her. With her rival now in the lead, Misaki decides to take action by joining the Dance League- even though everyone in the league is far ahead of her in terms of experience.
• Having surged to the top of the Dance League with more main character power, Misaki is picked for an elite dance troupe, but can she keep up the pace? And why is someone trying to sabotage her efforts with a serious of vicious practical jokes?

Meine Liebe Potter

It’s been a while since our last Meine Liebe crossover, but now the bishies are back, and this time they are attending Hogstohl School of HARD GAY Wizardry, a place where they learn the magic of seducing other men. Let’s take a look at the line-up.

Orpherus Potter: The destined main character.

Ed Weasley: The red-haired sidekick.

Naoji Granger: The accomplished feminine friend.

Camus Longbottom: The useless but benign ally.

Bernard Snape: Takes over as headmaster in his predecessor’s absence, seems evil at first.

Nicholas Malfoy: The ultimately insignificant rival.

Beruze Voldermort: The evil behind all other evils.

Bartholomeus Dumbledore: The invincible headteacher.

Eilos Quirrell: A teacher of minor evil.

Sadly, Lui declined to participate, believing that no one in the Harry Potter universe could possibly match his 1337ness.

Sisters of Wellber 9

“…for HARD YURI?”

“I promise it will just be a quick one!”

“Fine, but nothing too kinky, okay?”

“Yay, let’s get undressed straightaway!”

“I’ll get you warmed up with a kiss.”

“That was…strangely pleasant.”

“What an impressive ‘weapon’!”

“Hello, I am generic bald retainer #1- you may have seen me in other series.”

Random Thoughts: Zhou Yu

This week we talk to yet another face from the Three Kingdoms era- Wu strategist Zhou Yu. First up, we’d like you to talk about your relationship with Zhuge Liang.

Well, as two well-endowed men (in every sense of the word), we were rivals from the get-go, but I won’t deny that there was a lot of sexual tension between us. We both wanted it, but we were each afraid that the other one would be bigger and better.

In the ROTK anime, how did you feel about being portrayed as a squint-eyed villain?

I wasn’t happy about that at all- that anime was really Shu-centric, and it suffered for it. Everyone knows Wu is the best kingdom.

What was the atmosphere like on the set of Koutetsu Sangokushi?

So many virile young men wanting to get into each other’s pants- what do you think? We had arguments, of course, but as long as we all got some it tended to calm down in the end.

Were you told that you would be killed off in episode thirteen?

I had a sneaking suspicion when everyone else had their contracts renewed for the second half of the series and I didn’t hear anything. You hope it’s just lost in the post or something, but when I got on set and the director took me to one side I thought “ah-ha, this is it”. Of course I’m sad to leave, but I think I did a good job in the episodes I was given.

And finally, just how good are you at your Flute?

Which one?

This Week in Anime

Painting 1/1 scale models is a task for the dedicated enthusiast only.

“It’s that damned cherry pie again- I just can’t help myself.”

How many Pizza Hut signs can you spot?

McDonalds fights back against Pizza Hut domination.

Eat healthy oranges, however, and you might just get a free dog!

Anime World Tour: Avenger

Welcome to future Mars- not the beautiful blue planet Aqua that you know and love, but a more depressing vision of the red planet. We freely admit that there are one or two minor problems here, such as limited resources, the inability to conceive children and the trivial matter of Earth’s Moon being about to crash into the planet, but we urge you to put these trifling issues aside and enjoy the unique delights we do have to offer. Whether you fancy having a mechanical doll to attend to your every need, or you just want to spice up your day with a front row seat at local coliseum for a spot of gladiatorial combat, we’ve got you covered! Particularly daring visitors can even step into the arena themselves, and before you think twice about risking your life on a daily basis, be advised that the reward for victory is a life of luxury as the local gladiatorial representative! So don’t delay, pay a visit to Mars today!

Mini-editorial: OEL, its purpose and future

When manga started becoming popular in the West, it seemed as if there was going to be a great way for artists and money-makers to jump on the bandwagon- namely with a home-grown knock-off imitation style that would come to be known as OEL (Original English Language) manga. Although I personally have ventured no further into the OEL scene than buying a single volume of Van Von Hunter, it seems to be commonly accepted that overall, it just isn’t up to par with the authentic manga scene.

Now, just why should this be- surely Japan cannot have some kind of monopoly on good artists and storytellers? Wasn’t the American comic scene thriving long before we knew about manga? By rights, there should certainly be people in the West who can produce a good series to be printed under the OEL name, so where are they?

Perhaps it is simply that OEL as a whole is just attracting the “wrong sort” of people, namely those who only wish to ape their favourite style without caring about whether it has any real substance. Whether it’s for fame (“yay, everyone will read my story, the next great series about a boy with a magical sword!”) or another of Stu Levy’s moneymaking attempts to whip up a hit, groovin’ series under his d.j. milky alias, the end result always seems to be akin to a light bubblegum product- bright coloured and appealing to the kids, but generally unsatisfying.

So, to those more experienced with OEL than I, I must ask- are there any worthy titles out there, or is it all just one big moneymaking venture that happens to be cheaper than licensing real manga? Thoughts in the comments section, please.

Harem of the week: Yukito (Air)

He may be new in town, but he quickly gains the attention of the ladies with his main character charms. He’s also notable as one of the few likeable harem masters.

Harem

Misuzu: The sick girl with added clumsy cheerfulness and odd habits. Gao~

Kano: The energetic one with a positive exterior that masks a darker secret.

Minagi: The quiet and shy one, also with a tragic back story.

Haruko: The older women with a taste for alcohol.

Hijiri: Kano’s sister and the town doctor.

Michiru: The cheerful younger girl, there is more to her than meets the eye.

Amusing Search Terms

pearls vs. coral mai otome: the specifics of the Otome world are worth writing a thesis about.

kira yamato the in the and the and the: in the what? Kira Yamato the HARD GAY in the bedroom with Athrun and the sex toys and the Zhuge Liangs…?

Mint CD no desu wa! Tokyo Mew Mew charac: I know everything about Tokyo Mew Mew, surely I do…

“mai otome” +fanservice is removing my b: I wish this hadn’t been cut off- was it bra? Buttocks? Better Half?

Is tabby (hack roots) sexy?: If you can’t decide for yourself, the divided opinions of the internet won’t help.

anime boys: makes a change from the constant searches for girls, I guess.

koutetsu sangokushi gay: It sure is.

Fate Stay Night Tactics: I’m thinking more of making Fate/Stay Night Warriors.

How the poor lived in victorian England: Azure Flame, the place to go to when you need help with your homework assignments.

Aagh: Quite.

pictures of (fat men) anime: some people have strange tastes.

azure-nude.net: I’m almost tempted to see if this domain exists.

topless bathing: Mai-Otome Zwei episode 3.

An anime pic of mother crying: Is your mother in anime?

Amusing Spam

“Kalina…

I could not believe the amount of quality material on this site. The site is extremely eyecatching and pulls the reader straight it, the articles are great quality and are very professionally written. I have seen too many of these sites where it looks…”

“Fred…

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It’s great to be praised…by bots.

“vitamin supplements…

The best whore slut news may take a bit of time to get at….”

Well it will do if you’re looking up vitamin supplements.

“If you want do delete your site from our spam bases – just email us with domain of your site: abuse-here@inbox.ru

thank you!”

Yay, I got one too.

The Higurashi Cookbook

With the numerous cookbooks and cooking shows on TV, it can be hard for novice chefs to know just where they should start. Worry no longer, however, for we have just the solution- in the form of the comprehensive and easy to use Higurashi Cookbook! And here on Tuesday Rumble, we have been given exclusive permission to reprint extracts from this, the newest contender on the culinary literature market.

• Now remember, when making snacks, be sure to push the needles in as far as they will go. The last thing you need is your hapless victims realising what they are about to bite into.
• Bitter-tasting poisons add a nice spice to the traditional bento box, and should be readily employed alongside more conventional sauces and flavourings.
• When preparing meat, be sure to use a nice, sharp cleaver. There’s nothing more rewarding than chopping it up into nice, small chunks. Also note that rare steak is in this season; the bloodier the better.
• The Oyashiro-sama platter requires extensive preparation, but once you get the knack of disembowelling the animal, you will be well on your way to preparing this most rare of delicacies.
• Don’t throw away those bits and pieces left over after a nice long torture session- toss them all into the pot and boil them all up for a tasty soup.

Pick up these and other handy food preparation tips in the Higurashi Cookbook- on sale now from all good retailers!

The Nice Boat Panel

Especially for this week’s Tuesday Rumble, we showed the ‘nice boat’ replacement for School Days 12 to a test audience, who were specifically told that this was the real final episode. Let’s see their reactions.

A: If you ask me, this was the best episode of the series, although I think the studio was quite bold to switch to entirely live action.

B: Yes, it certainly beats everything Gainax has come up with.

C: I don’t know about you guys, but I had a hard time making out the characters, who I assume were meant to be inside the boat.

B: What was that boat all about anyway? Was it meant to be a metaphor for something?

A: Of course it was! Couldn’t you see that it symbolised how the leads had thrown away their youthful innocence in favour of short-term gratification?

C: I thought it was a ferry taking Makoto across the Styx.

A: No, no, that’s way too obvious- you’ve got to look deeper.

B: Hey, you don’t think that this wasn’t actually the final episode of School Days, do you?

A: Don’t be stupid! This ending fits the series perfectly!

At this point, our panel is told the truth

A: Oh… [signs off]

B: Wow, the real ending has a nice boat too!

C: Which was the real ending again?

Sister of Wellber 8

“Give me HARD GAY!”

“Ah thank you, and what a worthy sword it is too.”

“It is completely alien to those of us who prefer men.”

“And now I suppose you want something in return for the HARD GAY.”

“Oh come on, we’ve had HARD GAY ever since we were children.”

“But since then, it’s been hard to find the time.”

“And now that you are carrying my child, you probably won’t want to do it too often.”

“You fool- my Sword is more than a match for yours even if I am pregnant!”

“Feel my Blade!”

“Oh yes, that’s good!”

“And now for the climax!”

“Ah yes, HARD GAY is truly for me- in fact, I hate women so much that I have started murdering them.”

Meanwhile, Tina is ready for some HARD YURI.

“Just get undressed already!”

“He fears that the Prince is overexerting himself, and that it may damage the baby.”

No mention of this series would be complete without a touch of HORSE.

Random Thoughts: Alphonse Elric

This week we talk to Al of Fullmetal Alchemist! Al, how did you feel when you landed your breakout role- and were then told that you’d be spending the series as a suit of armour?

Well, of course it wasn’t quite what I imagined, but sometimes you have to take a chance and work with what you’re given. I think it turned out well overall, and it’s certainly made me a household name, even if no one ever seems to buy my merchandise. I mean come on people, please at least get one of my die-cut key rings.

Did you ever think of using your uniqueness to your advantage to land roles in other series as a mech?

It’s funny that you should ask that, because I did go on Utawarerumono for a bit- I was Kuuya’s Avu Kamuu, and the guys from Lab 5 played Hien and Hau’s armours. You might have also spotted me on Busou Renkin, but I didn’t want to take too many roles because there’s always a danger of being typecast.

Ah yes, of course. Do you think you’ll ever go down the armour route again, or are you happy in your own body?

I’m very happy with my work as a suit of armour, but in my mind that’s over and done with now. I want to see what I can do with my own strength, instead of being picked because I happen to be large and metallic.

Did you ever think it was more than coincidence that come rain or shine, your blood seal never washed away?

I was worried about that at first, and because the producers wanted that emotion in my performance, they never really reassured me. I think it really honed my performance, but in retrospect I realise they wouldn’t let one of their stars get killed on set.

And finally, do you have any juicy secrets about Ed that you’d like to reveal to us?

Nii-san would kill me if I said anything!

This Week in Anime

“Friends, I am here to save you.”

“I know I suggested experimenting with Mallet, but this isn’t quite what I had in mind.”

“Tea!? I hate tea!”

Note the cross-shape on the cat’s face, a clear indication of a Mikoto-type.

“So anyway, like I was saying- these apples are nutritious and delicious!”

A new Fruit Alliance is formed.

Anime World Tour: Higurashi no Naku Koro ni

Welcome to Hinamizawa, a quiet 1980s village perfect for taking a relaxing break from the stress of modern city life! Enjoy the sights and sounds of this unique village, and stay for our annual Watanagashi festival, featuring good food, good fun and dancing from our own Furude Rika! Visit Hinamizawa now, and enjoy wholesome fun for everyone!

Please note: in most a scant handful of insignificant realities, there is a chance that you may get bloodily murdered by the psychotic residents. We are required by law to warn you of this, but in truth the risk is very real minimal and will most likely end in your death not affect your stay.

OST spotlight: Makai Kingdom

As I said yesterday, Makai Kingdom was bereft of the input of composer Tenpei Sato, but whilst this makes it weaker than the average NIS game soundtrack, it isn’t as bad as everyone makes out. Admittedly, there’s a lot of looping and stretches of filler tracks, but nonetheless the music manages to retain that quirky Netherworld atmosphere, and it even tosses in some catchy action themes along the way. It’s perfect music for easy background listening- not worthy of the bulk of your attention, but a nice accompaniment to whatever work you may be doing at the time.

Notable tracks: The Devil’s Entrance, Darkness Darkness, Alexander the God of Destruction, Makai Fusion, Quiet Tension

Mini-rant: Answering back to Answerman

Answerman has angried up my blood for a long time, but never before did I feel compelled to write about it- until today (or rather last week, but I ran out of time). He’s always been grumpy, grouchy and inclined to jump down the throats of people who dare to disagree with him and the Great ANN-ADV Alliance, but finally the balance has been tipped by ill-timed venturing onto the forums. Like a troll with the power and right to be there, Answerman moves between threads, ready to spread sarcastic comments wherever he goes. Now personally, I couldn’t care less whether not his opinion coincides with mine- what really gets on my wick, so to speak, is the way he so takes against anyone who doesn’t appreciate that he is right and all-knowing. Worse yet, whenever he writes a filler column revisiting old questions and answers, he routinely admits that he either lied or didn’t know what he was talking about- quite ironic for someone who puts himself on such a pedestal.

Anyway, for the good of all I tend not to read Answerman anymore, but I just had to write this self-indulgent little rant, and now let us imagine Answerman’s reply were he to read this-

“Oh whoop-de-do, I got flamed by some wannabe writer from an insignificant blog at the back end of the internet- I really will be losing sleep tonight! Go and get a life, sister- you don’t like me, deal with it. And don’t put words into my mouth, you aren’t the remotest bit funny.”

In Your Reflection

This week, we see a head-to-head between two black and white pairs of creatures- the Mokonas from Tsubasa/xxxHOliC and the Usas from Magical Pokan. Both are paired magical creatures with special abilities and a generally laid back attitude, although the Mokonas are somewhat more impressive in that they can talk, move items between dimensions and even have their own plushies.

Amusing Search Terms

Old favourites: Romance of the Three Kingdoms Goes Hentai

december may romance: it’s not really the time of year for that.

anime expecting mother: erm, okay…

when did claymore go downhill: It was around about the OP, I feel.

garra and naruto making out: Sometimes you just have to laugh.

x parodies: For x, insert parody title here.

manga+face of emotion+rpg maker: It’s like some sort of bizarre word association.

lu xun x gan ning: Oh come on, Gan Ning is Zhou Yu’s bitch and everyone knows it.

anime watches girls: it does?

fat anime girls: all I can say is “hmm”

“ways of hard gay”: Yes, you must learn the ways.

Amusing Spam

“Jack…

Nice!…”

Yeah, Jack does do some good work.

“stimulate libido…

Locating the top women health info is not easy….”

It can’t be easy, or else you wouldn’t have ended up on an anime blog.

“fat loss 4 idiots review…

It is legitimate that getting true info on this subject can be difficult….”

Damn those idiots!

“Eric…

In a recent study, researchers at Indiana University examined the behavior of men and women during a speed-dating session and came up with some not-so-surprising findings…”

Really? Tell me more!

“hair loss in young women…

It is so important that we in the younger generation and our children learn from first hand experiences..thanks again…..”

Yet we must also respect our wise balding elders.

“Work from home jobs…

”Real Work At Home Job That Pays $150 – $2,000 a day. …”

What is it- prostitution?

“Eric…

I like the way you have layed it down in this post thanks….”

Eric knows how to lay it down, he da man, brudda.

“games of free online sex anime…

The best online dating site Adult Dating Personals, live out your sexual fantasies and discover a new playmate online or adult swingers, whether you are looking for a one night stand, or casual sex encounters. http:…”

Hahaha…is all I have to say.

“poker chip sets cheap…

A great deal of the web sites that you will uncover dealing with this matter are very knowledgeable, while many are not….”

That just about covers it, then.

Shounen Onmyouji X Dennou Coil

An unlikely pairing, perhaps, but this crossover was suggested with but one aim in mind- the alliance of Isako and Kazane. Whilst Isako takes the role of chief villain in the series, Kazane becomes her loyal underling, and together the two girls achieve the one thing most villains cannot- they actually manage to take over the world. Can anyone stand against the combination of futuristic encoder techniques and the onmyou magic of historical fantasy? Find out on Dennou Onmyouji, aka Shounen Coil!

Ridiculous gaming challenges

• Final Fantasy 7: Complete game with initial equipment, no materia and if possible no item use or levelling up.
• Final Fantasy 8: Complete game with no junctioning, weapon remodelling or advanced limit breaks (i.e. ones that require special items or weapon upgrades to learn).
• Disgaea: Complete game with only story characters and prinnies, or for an added challenge, only prinnies.
• Phantom Brave: Complete game with only Marona- no confining allowed. Weaker gamers may heal and buy weapons on the island.
• Ratchet and Clank: Complete games with only the wrench, except where a specific weapon or gadget is absolutely necessary to advance the series.
• .hack: Complete all four games with Kite alone (with initial equipment), except for when other characters must come along to advance the story. For added challenge, do not use items or skills, and only save at the end of each game. Grunties are not allowed.
• Final Fantasy Tactics: Complete game with only story characters and the generics you are given at the beginning of the game; or better yet, with only Ramza and guest characters (you may bring out one more character when two squads are needed). No class changes are allowed.
• Final Fantasy X: Complete game without using the Sphere Grid at all. Summons are not allowed.
• Final Fantasy X-2: Complete game with default dresspheres.
• Legend of Dragoon: Complete game without Additions or Dragoon transformations.

Shining Tears X Wind 9

Of course you can, that’s the essence of HARD GAY.

“I’ll have sex with anything that’s got a pulse!”

“Take my giant Sword!”

Ah, another suggestive title.

When Fruit Attack

First a pineapple launches its assault.

“Counterattack!”

“Don’t tell me it’s embarrassing to be seen fighting fruit!”

“See how you like it!”

Bananas rise up for the second wave.

“We’re sick of being in so many banana peel jokes! How do you think we feel when the poor sap treads on us?”

“…even these fruit are deadly.”

Random Thoughts: Liu Bei

Following our exclusive interview with Zhuge Liang, we were given the chance to talk to Liu Bei himself! Liu Bei, how do you respond to accusations that your role in the Three Kingdoms era has been exaggerated to make you seem more righteous?

How dare you even suggest that my adventures in the novel and ROTK anime are less than one hundred percent realistic!? They are an exact portrayal of honourable and righteous nature, for I, Liu Bei, can do no wrong!

You did spend rather a lot of time in ROTK running away, though.

It’s called strategy- were I a lesser man, I would call you an asinine fool right now, but I am too kindly for that.

Ah yes, of course- but if you are indeed as honourable as you claim, why did you dash your son to the ground after Zhao Yun went to the effort of rescuing him?

I can make any number of children, but Zhao Yun is the one of a kind lover no man wants to surrender easily. Ah, the nights spent impaled on his Spear- good times, good times.

Okay then, moving on- why do you look so much like a girl in Koutetsu Sangokushi? Are you in fact meant to be a woman in that series?

Look, I’ll level with you- the royalties from Dynasty Warriors aren’t all that great now that there are so many playable characters, and my last steady employment was in a 1991 anime. If I’m getting paid, then I’ll wear any costume- even chest padding and a pink afro.

And finally- is Zhuge Liang really all that Zhuge?\r\nHe’s Zhuger than you can imagine.\r\n\r\n

This Week in Anime

Tomato suffers unfortunate fate.

Plush prinnies spotted.

Vegetables have a conference.

“Which vegetables should I choose?”

“Let’s go with these Sunrise-grown magic mushrooms!”

“Get your nondescript red fruit here!”

Darker than Black- an equal opportunities advertiser for fast food franchises.

No matter who or what you are, fruit is always watching you.

“Yeah, I caught these oranges trying to sneak in to our home.”

A new record is set for coffee milk drinking.

Anime World Tour: Koutetsu Sangokushi

Journey back to a very unique interpretation of 3^rd century China, one which will let you view your beloved Three Kingdoms era in a whole new light. In this alternate world, women have been replaced with good looking and virile young men, all seeking to get in bed with each other- and what’s more, they even have special magic devices to enhance their HARD GAY! Whether you fancy the flower gardens of Wu, the castle pleasure boats of Wei, or the gentle riversides or Shu, we have settings and men to suit every single taste! Sadly, however, we cannot admit women into our Pleasure paradise- please apply elsewhere.

OST spotlight: Final Fantasy X

Nobuo Uematsu is joined by two other composers on this soundtrack, resulting in a score that is “the same but different” as compared to its predecessors- the FF feel remains, but now there is a higher proportion of bold brass-led themes, and even an attempt at heavy metal. It is in the more introspective pieces that the OST does its best, however, with some simple yet memorable piano pieces standing out from the crowd. A fitting soundtrack to mark how FFX made the transition to a new console whilst retaining links to what had come before.

Notable tracks: To Zanarkand, Normal Battle, Summoned, Silence Before the Storm, The Splendid Performance, Brass de Chocobo, Attack, Path of Repentance, Suteki da ne, Decisive Battle, Ending Theme

Mini-editorial: spoiled by subs?

Although it may seem unfashionable to dig up that old subs vs. dubs issue, this week I want to follow on from the comments here to ask if an increased exposure to subbed anime lowers one’s tolerance for dubs, and if one can (or would even want to) go back.

Now, back in the early years of my proper anime addiction, slow internet at home and university rules on peer-to-peer programs meant that fansubs were neglected, leaving DVDs and TV broadcasts as my primary form of exposure. Back in those days, I would happily watch most dubs with little complaint, only switching to Japanese audio on the second viewing for DVDs.

In time, however, all that changed- combined exposure to fansubs and some awful dubs (Tenjho Tenge, for one), saw me switching to the Japanese audio immediately, to the point where it seemed wrong to even accidentally hear a line of English audio. Voice acting which had once been acceptable or even pleasing to the ears was now grating and painful to experience, and the thought of watching English language broadcasts on TV nigh untenable. Somehow, it didn’t seem so bad when playing games, but anime was now to be experienced in Japanese only.

Ultimately, then, are Japanese voice actors so much better than their English counterparts that listening them is akin to tasting fresh bread after years of stale toast, preventing one from ever going back? Is it just that the budget for dubbing anime is too low to allow for higher standards to be achieved? Do we get so tired of the same old set of voices that we simply cannot countenance hearing them over and over? Is it just better to always listen to things in their original language where possible (after all, would anyone want to try the likes of The Simpsons in Japanese for more than novelty purposes?).

In Your Reflection

This week we have a head-to-head between two mysterious red-haired bishies- Toya from Ceres, Celestial Legend and Mansairaku from the Tokyo arc of Otogi Zoshi. Both have a romantic connection with the female lead, and start off assisting her (or simply appearing) in the background before stepping forward to take a more active role in the plot.

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Useless Gaming FAQ Advice

Picture the scene- you’re so hideously stuck on a game that you just have to refer to a FAQ (or you’re just lazy), but instead of the detailed strategies you were hoping for, there is a statement so blatantly obvious it need never have been written in the first place. Here are some examples of the sort of frustratingly useless gaming advice you wish you’d never read.

• In this battle, what you need to do is beat the boss if you want to win.
• If your hero is at level 99, this battle will be easier than it would have been at level 50.
• If you’ve completed every optional quest and spent eighty hours levelling up, this battle will be easy; otherwise it will be impossible. Good luck.
• In order to defeat this enemy, just keeping attacking it until its HP reaches zero.
• This battle is very difficult, but if you keep trying, you will eventually win.
• If you get game over, you will have to reload and try again.

Final Fantasy Tactics: A remake for the 21^st century

As you may or may not know, there is now a PSP remake of Final Fantasy Tactics featuring various tweaks for the gameplay and character, but let’s ignore that and imagine how we could remake the enjoyable yet often hard FFT into something more suited for the “dumbed down” modern gamer.

• Increase party limit from five to fifteen, with the ability to switch characters in and out of battle at will or if a character dies. The maximum number of recruitable characters is now 99.
• When attacked, your characters have a 100% chance of dodging the attacking and countering with a deathblow.
• Skills are easier to learn, and everyone can have simultaneous access to every skill.
• Enemies never counterattack, and whilst they are affected by terrain, all of your characters are immune to such hindrances.
• There is no longer a time delay when allies cast magic, but enemies take at least ten turns to cast.
• Auto-Life, Auto-Regen and Auto-Reflect are switched on for every boss battle.
• New characters start at the same level as the main character, regardless of when they are recruited.
• Enemy levels scale with yours, so that they are always twenty levels below you.
• Shops give away items for free.
• If your party is wiped out, they are immediately revived, whilst the enemy units take damage equal to the HP used to revive them.

Mobile Suit Gundam

Someone has a rather large ego.

“Damn him! Now I might actually have to do something!”

(“I can’t believe they’ve replaced the bartender with a guy on a screen- talk about cost cutting.”)

“Everyone, let’s play Yu-Gi-Oh!”

“Don’t you think that’s going a bit overboard?”

“…and I know it!”

“We totally didn’t borrow this design from Star Trek.”

“It’s not supposed to break down- I’m the main character!”

Someone forgot to draw in the pupils…

…but with a bit of editing, it’s all better.

Random Thoughts: Zhuge Liang

This week we talk to Zhuge Liang, historical figure and star of both the ROTK anime and Koutetsu Sangokushi! Zhuge, would you like to talk a bit about your roles in both series?

Well, in ROTK I didn’t come in until later, but that was just to stop viewers from being overcome by my awesomeness. Once I started taking an active role, ratings really soared- and for good reason. All-in-all, I’m glad we were able to bring viewers such a historically accurate account of the Three Kingdoms era.

In Koutetsu, we’re trying to do something a bit different, with emphasis on my superiority, greatness and inexplicable magical powers. Basically, the idea behind the series is just to hire as many good looking men for me to sleep with as possible, and then ad-lib a script whenever we’re filming.

Is it true that you’re all-knowing, or are you just putting it on for the cameras?

How dare you even ask such a thing!? Of course I am all knowing- I am Zhuge Liang, son of God!

Out of your many partners, who is best in the bedroom?

It’s so hard to choose- I mean you’ve got Lu Xun’s youthful and innocent vigour, which is nice, but then there are times when you just want Pleasure with an experienced lover like Zhou Yu who knows exactly how to give you what you want.

How do you justify the complete lack of women in Koutetsu Sangokushi?

Women are unimportant- I only desire MEN.

And finally, how do you feel about your name now being as a synonym for “Huge Wang”?

It seems appropriate, given my mighty size. Would you like to see it?

Uh, I think I’ll pass.

This Week in Anime

Even though it’s meant to be Yeager, from certain angles it looks like Kevin Keegan.

The Pizza Hut invasion continues in Darker than Black.

Mao certainly seems to be getting fat on Pizza Hut.

Fruit is never far from the action.

Some people will do anything for sweet, sweet peaches.

Grapes infiltrate the Great Refrigerator.

HARD GAY corner: Lodoss War TV

On his continuing quest for HARD GAY, Parn hones his Sword skills and takes on lovers both old and new, from King Kashue and the well-endowed Ashram, to “berserker in the bedroom” Orson and “master of Staff” Cecil. Meanwhile, in the land of Flaim, a young knight-in-training named Spark practises HARD GAY from a young age, eventually growing up enough to be able to take partners such as “rough and ready” Garrack and “quietly Zhuge” Aldonova. In a surprise turn of events, however, Spark heralds the emergence of a new era by turning BI and also including women in his party, forcing Parn to return to the story and show the young man that Sword is always best.

OST spotlight: Ghost in the Shell Stand Alone Complex OST 2

Yoko Kanno showcases her talent at jazz composition in this soundtrack, my favourite of all the SAC OSTs to be released so far. Whilst not every track is on the mark (one in particular consists of what sounds like bees buzzing an anthem), when the powerful strains of origa’s Rise or one of the many other powerful vocal themes are reached, all weaknesses can be forgiven.

Notable tracks: Rise, I Can’t Be Cool, Psychedelic Soul, What’s it For, Living Inside the Shell

Mini-rant: Scanlators and e-Liangs

Inspired by this post, I decided to construct a self-serving rant of my own about the difficulty of “acquiring” manga from certain scanlation groups. Now, perhaps I should become less lazy and get on with improving my Japanese to a point where I can tackle the manga raw, maybe I should bow and scrape to the people who translate series I wouldn’t be able to read otherwise, but the real annoyance is- if you’ve gone to the trouble of releasing manga (presumably for fans to read), why make it so difficult to get hold of? I don’t mind going into IRC, or having to wait a few days- what I do mind is being asked to make n posts on a forum I have little to no interest in. If I wanted to post on your forums, I would be doing so already, and I don’t take kindly to being forced to do so.

In short, someone who is illegally scanning and translating manga doesn’t really have much ground with which to feel superior to the leechers they are doing it for- and if you aren’t doing it for said leechers, don’t bother to even advertise the fact that you’ve made such a release for everyone to see.

Reverse Harem of the week: Miaka Yuki (Fushigi Yugi)

When she went to another world, she was quick to amass bishounen to protect her, with her chirpy personality proving oddly attractive to them all.

Harem

Tamahome: The main guy and one she eventually ends up, their relationship went through a lot of angst before finally overcoming even the plot.

Hotohori: The emperor and second man, Hotohori adored Miaka and even challenged Tamahome for her, but eventually settled for an offscreen role with an abruptly introduced wife.

Nuriko: A cross-dresser who developed a crush on Hotohori, he nonetheless eventually admitted that the male part of his personality loved Miaka, causing him to make the ultimate sacrifice for her.

Chichiri: A priest and magic user with a dark past; not romantically attracted to Miaka but still one of her destined bishounen.

Tasuki: A hot-headed bandit who claimed to hate women until his hidden feelings for her were exposed by an enemy spell.

Mitsukake: A quiet doctor who lost his beloved in a plague; not romantically attracted to Miaka but still one of her destined bishounen.

Chiriko: A genius shota; not romantically attracted to Miaka but still one of her destined bishounen.

Amiboshi: A member of the enemy sent to infiltrate the destined bishounen; later in the story he wants Miaka to drop out of the plot and live with him forever.

Rivals

Yui: Miaka’s best friend turned rival and enemy, she tries to steal Tamahome from her at one point in the plot.

Suboshi: His devotion to both Yui and his brother caused him to violently attack and pursue Miaka.

Soi: Her love for Nakago made her jealous when he revealed his plan to steal Miaka’s virginity

Tomo: See above.

Nakago: He became determined to steal away everything important to Miaka, from her boyfriend to her virginity.

Amusing Search Terms

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“my bikini”: Coming soon from the folks at Sunrise- Mai-Bikini, a tale of fanservice and swimsuit episodes.

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Anime Nano: the RPG

The other day, a random remark on the Anime Nano forums gave birth to the idea of it being an MMORPG rather than a blog aggregator, and of course, me being me, I couldn’t help but think “where better to explore this idea than Tuesday Rumble?”. So, without further ado, let us explore Anime Nano: the RPG!

Choose your class: The first thing to do is invest your start-up points in creating a character. The cheapest class to create is Lurker, but with a little more effort you can go for Commenter instead. Purchase your own home base (blog), and your class immediately goes up to Blogger.

Tweak your stats: The next thing to do is assign bonus points to the various stats. Available stats include “Pretentious Elitist”, “Screencap Frenzy”, “Blow-by-Blow Summariser”, “Overanalyser”, “Straight Reviewer”, “Flame Baiter” and “Merchandise Whore”.

Time to play!: Now you are finally ready to step into the world of Anime Nano: the RPG. Much of the game is spent in blogging dungeons, using your abilities to hack and slash at endless waves of Flamers, Spammers and Trolls. The number of successive combo attacks you are able to perform in battle is determined by the number of hits your blog receives divided by one hundred; if you don’t have a blog, you can only ever perform a single hit combo.

Advanced Play: For those familiar with the game’s system, there are other, more advanced game play options to exploit. Form a permanent party by recruiting other writers to your blog, or a temporary one for multi-blog articles. Form trading alliances with links, or even declare war on other blogs. Whatever you do, avoid getting hit with the Hiatus status effect, since it usually leads to a slow and painful death.

Romeo X Juliet: X-treme(-ly over the top) version

After the revelations of episode seventeen, the time came to wonder- just how many more twists could the Romeo X Juliet anime throw our way? The only way forward, of course, was to delve deeper and come up with some of the more outlandish ideas the writers may still have in store.

• Romeo and Juliet are actually (half) brother and sister, making their entire love story completely incestuous.
• Hermione is actually Juliet’s half-sister, or at the least an adopted commoner who was switched at birth with Emilia.
• Cordelia (or perhaps Reagan) is the real Juliet, and Juliet is just a random generic.
• Antonio, Curio and Francisco are all Montague’s illegitimate sons.
• Romeo is not Montague’s son at all, since Portia had a one night stand with Conrad.

Reideen Again

“Look, girls!”

“Huh, who cares?”

“Well, there’s one other place, but it isn’t what you’d call practical or comfortable.”

“Yeah, Jack Squat’s a great guy, unlike his better known yet more offensive cousin.”

“Let’s have Pleasure!”

A new form of Hyper Self Pleasure is developed, code-named God Bird.

(“Did he break his arm having Hyper Self Pleasure?”)

It wouldn’t be Reideen without the damn swearing.

Even so, some people are trying to tone it down.

“Someone went and used a Qwack-o-Ray on us!”

Random Thoughts: Shinji, Asuka and Rei

With the upcoming release of the Rebuild of Evangelion movie, we decided to interview Shinji, Asuka and Rei on their hopes for the new movie series.

So, guys, what changes would you like to see in this remake?

Shinji: I definitely want to be kicking more backside! Let’s stop with this whole whiny Daddy’s boy thing and get me out there beating up bad guys with the best of them!\r\n

Rei: I’d like to actually have some skills instead of training for months and still having the lowest synch ratio.

Asuka: I should totally be the star this time around!

When you look back on the original series, do you feel that it has held up well, or was it even any good in the first place?

Shinji: I think mistakes were made and some things went wrong, but the fact that we were able to capture the public imagination so much has got to count for something.

Rei: I don’t care either way, really.

Asuka: if you ask me, everything went downhill when Shinji’s synch ratio overtook mine. Before that, I was in charge and everything was cruising along smoothly.

Has Eva’s continued popularity helped or hindered your careers?

Shinji: I’ve never really been able to escape the typecasting, which is a shame because I really wanted to try my hand at the whole outgoing shounen hero thing.

Rei: It was really a boon for my career- I got some choice roles like the part of Yuki Nagato on Haruhi, for example.

Asuka: I don’t know why, but everyone really goes for the Rei type- I can’t seem to get out of her shadow.

How would you respond to the people who say “enough is enough, let the damn franchise end already?

Shinji: I’m just glad I got to do something different in Angelic Days, which wouldn’t have been possible if the franchise hadn’t ballooned the way it did.

Rei: The revenue generated from PVC figure sales is really helping my bank balance, even if Gainax and the sculptors take a healthy cut of the profits.

Asuka: Enough is never enough! I’m never giving ground to those up and coming newbies!

Now for the individual questions. Shinji, can you shed some light on your apparent father complex?

Shinji: I do not have a father complex! I’m telling my dad about this!

Rei, was your emotionless performance a challenge to your skills, or did you long for more of a stretch?

Rei: At the time, I really wanted to be able to cut loose and show my emotions a bit more, but now I’m glad I played it the way I did, because it’s made me a really memorable character. Anyone can be a silly little girl, but playing it cool is a lot harder.

Asuka: I hope you weren’t referring to me just then!

Asuka, how did you react when you found out your character’s depressing back story?\r\nAsuka: It was a bit of a comedown- all this time I’d been feeling superior to the other two, and then it turned out I was as messed up as they were!

Well, thank you- we hope to have all of you back for more interviews.

This Week in Anime

Here we see fruit in its natural habitat.

An innocent slice of orange is impaled on the edge of a glass by an apple supporter.

“Just a little further…I can make it out of here!”

Heroic Age maintains its reputation for wide-wide-wide-angle shots.

Fat cat checks in on developments in Kaleido Star.

Nut forces threaten to overwhelm our leads.

Anime World Tour: Record of Lodoss War

Ever fancied dropping in on a world of classic fantasy? Why not try the so-called “cursed island” of Lodoss? Learn magic and swordsmanship from some bona fide heroes, visit classical kingdoms, meet dragons both good and evil and learn the secrets of elves and dwarves with our all inclusive trip to Lodoss Isle! Worship at the shrine of Marfa, participate in one of the many chaotic wars that plague the Isle, attend parties held by legendary kings and fulfil all your classic fantasy desires in one go! Who know, you may even find yourself on a heroic quest of your own!

OST spotlight: Heat Guy J

Heat Guy J is an odd soundtrack indeed, combining elements I usually wouldn’t have time for, such as looping and often random electronic themes, bagpipes and the dreaded J-rock to make something that actually has some catchy themes. I have to admit that there are stretches where you’ll just blank out and not really listen to it, but the sheer energy with which its quirky and often discordant themes are presented is enough to make it extremely catchy in places. One to at least try out, even if it doesn’t really suit your tastes, not to mention oddly reminiscent of the Noir and RahXephon music at times.

Notable tracks: Tribe, Rainbow Gate Park, Backstreet Guys, Black Box

Mini-editorial: Does commercialism exclude art?

A rather pretentious sounding title if you will, but let’s just go with it for the moment- do the needs of fulfilling an order for twenty-six (or however many) animated episodes on a given budget (whilst getting ratings and selling merchandise in the process) prevent any sort of artistic vision from being realised? Even if one retains the core essence of the original concept, does compromise prevent it from being the True Series it could have been? Is the integrity of a piece always destined to ever be compromised by the desire to pander to the audience? Can any anime, apart from perhaps Voices of a Distant Star, be said to be proper “art”, undiluted by the need to make money?

Then again, is making it for an audience merely a key element in the creation of so-called art? Aren’t plays written for people to come and watch, paintings created to sell and put on exhibition? Does it matter if a few elements are changed, as long as we can communicate the core essence of our vision to others? Can we possibly hope to use this line of argument to justify the creation of a model kit seller like Gundam Seed Destiny?

In the end, as we learn from Animation Runner Kuromi, the vast majority of anime is not meant to be high art, it’s just business. But if we can appreciate artistic qualities within it, does it really matter how they came about?

Harem of the week: Ayato Kamina (RahXephon)

The slowed down time of Tokyo Jupiter may have messed up his life, but Ayato was still able to connect with women from both his past and present.

Harem

Reika: The mysterious girl who guides the plot whilst having a deeper significance.

Megumi Shitow: The energetic and argumentative “friend your own age” type.

Haruka Shitow: The older woman, also with plot significance.

Quon: The second mysterious girl, fond of talking in riddles.

Fashion Police: Shigure

This week, the Fashion Police are after Kenichi’s Shigure for a double offence, starting with her default outfit. Her hair is at least nice and she does carry her costume off with confidence, but seriously, what’s up with that fishnet top and cerise tunice, not to mention the fact that certain screenshots seem to indicate that she isn’t in the habit of donning underwear?

Then we move onto this, her revealing “bandages only” swimsuit, surely in danger of unravelling whenever she performs strenuous martial arts.

Fashion sense: C

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“were to sky dive…

The period of perpetually digging up dependable opinions having to do with this topic have ended….”

I agree, it’s time to stop investigating where to sky dive and just stick with the places other people used.

“emeraldrocks…

Once you totally appreciate this, you will be able to work more effectively….”

I hope so.

“home business…

Sometimes, you”ll become overwhelmed by the enormous quantity of attitude information out there….”

Yeah, I know.

“Our ambition is to point you in the right direction for sex investigation….”

Good for you.

“vegetable diet soup…

The normal everyday fellow would be under the impression that investing the time to obtain intellect on this topic of interest is a waste of resources….”

But vegetable diet soup is such a worthy topic! I have so much more to say about it

“fast weight loss diets…

It can occasionally get difficile to set apart the valuable diet soda info from the bad….”

I agree, there’s just so much information about diet soda out there.

“hallo everybody users of site azureflame.ikimashou.net I not so a long ago I live in Oshkosh

and so, that I divided with dear a man, Paul/Lisa – Craigkon, and now try to find him, last that I know so it that he lives in citi, and often vi

sits the resources of type your azureflame.ikimashou.net, names on itself Leeporkon

, if suddenly will see this nik write that this man contacted with me . I very much I miss without socializing with this man.To reason wanted to say thank you and to wish successes to the team of developments and web masters your resource. So to hold boys. Only little request of,sdelayte more graphic arts on pages on a subject”

I got several spam of this type, all looking for a different person.

“The plan of bonification of Telextreme is fantastic, therefore with few indications you can form a net of distribution of much success and excellent financial return. Visit:”

I so want to be a part of this…whatever it is.

Ever felt that there wasn’t enough to Chevalier? Maybe you just wanted the HARD GAY scenes to be shown onscreen? If that’s the case, then you won’t want to miss this exclusive look at the scenes that never made it into the broadcast version.

Scenes included:

• Orleans’ final HARD GAY with Broglie.
• An extended flashback about the intimate relationship Teillagory had with his son.
• A lengthier explanation as to why Robespierre suddenly had to leave this world.
• Teillagory training young d’Eon and Lia with his old antique.
• A hilarious “light” segment in which d’Eon desperately tries to avoid Anna’s pursuit through the city.
• Increased screen time and back story for Giuseppe and Lorenza.
• More convenient escapes by carriage.

Sadly, Louis and Broglie doing the deed will never be made available, due to potential audience trauma.

Disgaea: Pizza Version

Remember Pizza Shack’s Teriyaki Pizza, or that “hilarious” pizza in the face incident in the anime? With these in mind, it seems clear that Disgaea should be the latest franchise to gain a “Pizza version”.

In Disgaea-Pizza version, Prince Laharl awakens from a two-year nap to find that the pizza industry has gone to hell. Desperate to bring order back to the chaos, Laharl vows to build a pizza empire unlike any ever seen before. By recruiting new characters and their knowledge of recipes and pizza-making techniques, Laharl can build up his pizza company, participating in “pizza contest” battles along the way, in which his party must rush to assemble fast food orders before the enemy destroys all the ingredients. Lose, and game over is signalled by a pizza in the face.

Nana

“My on/off switch is there.”

“Stop resisting and just fondle my breasts!”

“Friends always do this kind of thing.”

“Maybe if we were in private, I would grope you.”

“Just do what I say, or I’ll tell everyone here that you have an Ezo!”

“It’s a proper Liang!”

“Newsflash- women don’t have Liangs in the first place.”

Random Thoughts: Ash

This week we talk to Ash from Phantom Brave! Ash, did you ever feel annoyed at being a main character who died in the first scene?

Dying is always a bummer, but when you think that it could have been the end of my career, I’m happy that I was able to accomplish so much even after my demise. I hope that this will inspire others not to give up just because they were killed off.

You can be honest here- how do you cope with Marona’s endless optimism?

I do wish she’d think of herself a bit more, but her attitude is all part of her charm. I’d say it’s because of the differences in our personalities that the two of us work so well together.

How did you come up with your battle cry?

Do you like it? I spent a while thinking it up, and I was just delighted when I got the chance to finally start using it in battle. “You’ll go no further- for her sake, I will not fail!”

How do you rank yourself against the other Nippon Ichi lead characters?

The girls are great, of course, but when it comes to the guys we have a bit of a rivalry going on. I’m pretty sure I’ve got the edge over that arrogant Laharl and heroic Adell- and as for Zetta, well, he’s a book!

And finally, what would your feelings be if a sequel to Phantom Brave was announced?

I get the feeling Nippon Ichi have told our story, and that if they made a sequel it would have new leads, but as long as I got invited back for a guest appearance I’d be happy.

This Week in Anime

The love-child of Mokona and Moo-chan is revealed.

Sharing apples is a good way to get to know someone.

Once you become a princess, HORSE is readily available.

Ray Mears offers some more survival tips.

Anime World Tour: Chrono Crusade

Welcome to the Roaring Twenties, although perhaps not quite as you read about them! If you thought it was all about Prohibition, gangland wars and dancing the Charleston, then think again, because here in the good old US of A we also have a brand new pastime- summoning demons! Anyone wishing to dabble in the demonic arts should take care, however, for these fiendish beasts have a mind of their own- be sure to bring along plenty of holy objects and sacred bullets to make sure they do your bidding. Prospective visitors are also warned to be on the lookout for a young blonde nun named Rosette Christopher, since all reports indicate that the chances of personal injury are greatly increased in her presence. Please exercise caution, but don’t be put off from visiting- after all, where else can you hear the angelic tones of Azmaria?

Mini-editorial: Pride, Depth and Entertainment, a.k.a. commenting on dorama from a safe distance

Blogging dorama comes and goes, and over the past week it has condensed around two ideas- first the question of whether we should be proud of our anime viewing, and second the Owen-inspired mess of whether anime is deep or entertaining. As part of the ongoing mission of keeping this section relevant, let’s briefly deal with them both.

First, the issue of pride- should we openly embrace our love of our hobby, or should we hide it away like the otaku losers we all are? Does the fact that anime is, as Drm calls it “a slightly better cartoon” often aimed at young people mean that we must hide our association with it away? Can one really ogle the large “melons” in the likes of Tenjho Tenge and then try to convince the acquaintances who already think that it’s all Pokemon and tentacles that you aren’t immature, perverted or both?

Personally, if someone asks me about my hobbies, I probably will mention anime- the only reason not to is because I can’t be bothered to explain what it is (yet again). I’m not going to go on about it all the time or force it down people’s throats, but if it comes up in conversation, then so be it. Of course, there are some things that still don’t seem right to be admitted in casual conversation, such as writing HARD GAY parodies or playing eroge, but ultimately, whilst losers can watch anime, watching anime cannot magically make you a loser.

And so we move onto the whole talked to death “deep or entertaining”, to which we can conclude that whilst all anime is intended to be entertaining (although you’d have to go pretty far to find someone who is genuinely entertained by Shining Tears X Wind), only a small fraction of it will ever be thought-provoking and “deep”. In the end, though, the important thing is to enjoy it- else why are you watching it?

In Your Reflection

This week we see a head-to-head between two blonde beauties- R.O.D. TV’s Michelle and Aria’s Michelle. Both are gentle, soft-spoken and optimistic, but are able to inspire the respect of everyone around them.

Fashion Police: Adell

This week, the Fashion Police are in pursuit of this individual- the main character of Disgaea 2. Everything about him seems to be a poor fashion choice- the sleeveless shirt with huge collar, the inexplicably large tie, the pointless belt, the baggy trousers, the bare shoulders, the wrist guards and the loafers- why, why, why?

Fashion sense: D-

Amusing Search Terms

Mai-Otome diaper: Mai-Otome themed diapers? Now that’s going too far.

Naisho No Count: What? Is this a manga?

tsubasa reservoir chronicle convoluted

tenitsu x suzaku: Now, now…Suzaku is clearly HARD GAY.

iroha caitsith English: When do Iroha and Cait Sith go together?

sex rumble rumble rumble: Get ready to rumble!

tsubasa broglie: Chevalier Chronicle

Animes having sex: I told you before- anime can’t have sex.

hard gay without his glasses: We don’t deal with Hard Gay here, only HARD GAY.

photobucket h-game: Right…

CLAMP Tsubasa Acid Tokyo Cover: Sometimes I wonder if CLAMP really are on acid.

harvest moon year 2007: Imagine playing Harvest Moon for 2007 game years. I’ve sworn to never play again after only 3 years.

gay dynasty warriors: Zhang He.

anime resimleri: Another “what?” is in order.

]]> http://azureflame.dasaku.net/2007/08/07/tuesday-rumble-august-7th/feed/ 4 http://azureflame.dasaku.net/2007/07/31/tuesday-rumble-july-31st/ http://azureflame.dasaku.net/2007/07/31/tuesday-rumble-july-31st/#comments Tue, 31 Jul 2007 10:43:32 +0000 Karura http://azureflame.ikimashou.net/2007/07/31/tuesday-rumble-july-31st/ (For some reason, the anime blog scene has been overtaken with ideas about how to find love (in the 3D sense), and so I will impart a small bit of advice to the guys- go to dance lessons. I know you’ll now be thinking how much less appealing this is than some MANLY team sport, but let’s just think for a moment about which sounds more HARD GAY- getting into a close hold with a (hopefully) beautiful woman, or getting naked in the locker room showers with ten other guys?

Anyway, the advantages of attending dance lessons are as follows-

• Women will always, always outnumber men at the lessons. That means you get your pick of single ladies (note: do not try to compete with the good looking male instructor).
• Women will be impressed if you can dance, since it’s a rare skill among men.
• If all goes well, you’ll know how to dance in plenty of time for your wedding.

Ideas for Phantom Brave 2

I know manga disagrees, but I enjoyed Phantom Brave, and yet the basic system was also in need of some improvements. Here are a few suggestions for making Phantom Brave 2, without simply answering “Makai Kingdom”

• Bring back ranged attackers; seriously, what was with the lack of gunners and proper archers (I can hardly count an archer who only has a bow attack when unequipped).
• Add riding animals such as horses for characters to get on and increase their range/attacks.
• Make it easier for a character to extend the number of turns they are on the field through levelling up.
• Encourage use of Putty and Owl types by creating optional maps where only those classes can be used.
• Increase the number of available Boar type classes.

Bokurano: Gonzo endings predicted

By now, we all know that the Bokurano director doesn’t want to permanently kill off all the children, and that as long as it doesn’t involve magic, the mangaka doesn’t mind if the ending is changed. With that in mind, let’s try to guess at how it will turn out.

• The prize for winning the game is to reset the world to how it was at the beginning, or to revive the players (who cares about dead generics).
• When the players signed the contract, they actually fell unconscious and were put into a VR simulation. At the end, they all emerge from pods.
• There is a parallel universe where they are all alive and living happy lives.
• Everyone is just unconscious and sealed inside Zearth until the end.
• It was all a dream Kokopelli had in the shower.

Ayakashi Ayashi

Generic #1 expresses his HARD GAY preference.

“Attractive as you are, I won’t give in to my desire!”

“Could this be a rare woman?”

“Nope, I’m a man too!”

“You can upgrade your Rod as much you want, but it won’t improve your HARD GAY.”

“Usually you just get straight down to the Pleasure.”

The first enemy, Giant Wang, appears.

Monster Pleasure begins.

Giant Wang faces off against another enemy, Multi-Wang.

“Is he our destined HARD GAY partner?”

Monster Pleasure gets taken to the next level.

“I must join in with some Cannon!”

“I told you no good would come of this sort of HARD GAY!”

Giant Wang is defeated.

Multi-Wang strikes again.

Random Thoughts: Shion

This week, we talk to Shion from the Xenosaga games. Shion, can you explain how you got to be a first-class scientist when you seem to be largely incompetent?

Head scientists don’t need to be competent *laughs*- we just let our underlings do the work and take credit for it. Anyway, I initially got my job because my character design was much less generic than anyone else’s.

How do you explain how your character design shifted so much?

Jealous, aren’t you? I just spent some skill points on levelling up my appearance.

Did you create KOS-MOS just for HARD YURI?

No, no- of course not! …How did you know? Did you find the photos? I swear I was only trying that bondage gear on!

Do you ever wish the games had been created as they were initially envisioned, in six spacetime-spanning parts?

No, because then I would have only been in the first game, and I would never have got the appearance upgrade.

And finally- are hot pants the answer to the Xenosaga universe?

Yes- yes they are.

This Week in Anime

“Mmm, good apple.”

“Crispy and sweet.”

Oranges find a new guardian to protect their stronghold.

Don’t like oranges? Try some lemons.

Forget Cup Noodle- try some Cat Noodle.

“I shall prove myself worthy of these olives and meat buns!”

“So I just put it in the backside here, right?”

The Pizza Hut era in Darker than Black begins.

Fruits band together to make an assault on meat.

“Looks like the horse is ready and waiting.”

July Anime Awards

The “Best Anime Ever” for Consistent Quality in the Face of Declining Standards Elsewhere goes to Dennou Coil, the new best anime ever.

The Darkly Comical Award for Finding Amusement in Suicide Attempts goes to Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei for its bleak humour.

The ER Award for Longest Medical Arc goes to Saiunkoku Monogatari II.

The “Where are the Answers?” Award for Frustrating Lack of Plot Development goes to Darker than Black.

The “What the Hell is Going On?” Award for a Complete Lack of Sense goes to Mushi-Uta.

The Rail Adventures Award for Train Otaku goes to Tetsuko no Tabi.

The Predictably Amusing Award for Mild Entertainment goes to Doujin Work.

The Insomniac Cure for Dullness is shared between Seirei no Moribito and El Cazador de la Bruja. Watching the former before bed the other night was a good way to induce tiredness.

The On the Rails Award for Standard Adventures goes to Romeo X Juliet and its mining arc.

The HARD GAY Award for Effeminate Males is still held by Koutetsu Sangokushi.

The Inoffensive Award for, well, Inoffensiveness goes to Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Kai.

HARD YURI corner: Kaleido Star New Wings

Having lost her HARD YURI lover, Sora has to resort to Hyper Self Pleasure until Kalos arranges for her to have STRAIGHT with a new performer, Leon. Unfortunately, Leon decides that rival May is better at STRAIGHT, and Sora is left to continue her Self Pleasure. In desperation, she returns to Layla and even tries Yuri as a partner, but despite her continuing cheerfulness, she cannot land a permanent partner. After much training, however, she is finally worthy of Leon, but choosing him will mean giving up HARD YURI forever in favour of STRAIGHT…

OST spotlight: Fantastic Children

As excellent as the series it accompanies, the Fantastic Children OST uses haunting piano and cello themes alongside some Celtic-style tracks to weave a melancholy and poignant atmosphere. Even if you haven’t watched the series yet (and if you haven’t, why not?), this OST is a must-listen.

Notable tracks: Voyage (Cello version), Befort no Kodomo-tachi, Helga, Helga no Zensei, Helga (Cello version), Sentou, Mizu no Madoromi

Mini-editorial: Acquisition above enjoyment

There comes a stage in every collector’s life where you find yourself buying items at a rate faster than you can appreciate them, be it manga, anime or games. When this happens, one has so many unfinished games, unwatched DVDs or unread books that it isn’t hard to lose interest entirely- after the brief flicker of getting something good in the post, the item in question is merely tossed into the nearest shelf and abandoned. Is this phase inevitable, or will we always end up in a state of buying things to have them rather than to use them? Can we ever recapture the old feelings, even if it means a break from that hobby? I know this factor contributed to the close of my first gaming era, and so in this era, I’m only going to buy games once I’ve finished or definitively abandoned the ones I have.

Harem of the week: Cloud Strife (Final Fantasy 7)

A man of few words and so few accomplishments that he had to claim his best friend’s memories for his own, Cloud nonetheless exuded some kind of pull over women.

Harem

Aeris: The quiet and innocent flower girl with mystical powers, predisposed towards Cloud due to her attraction to Zack.

Tifa: The childhood friend with large “melons”.

Priscilla: The young animal lover who instantly vows to marry Cloud.

Jessie: The chirpy freedom fighter with a penchant for disguises and fake IDs.

Yuffie: The headstrong teen ninja with a flippant attitude.

Barret: He may be a man, but you can go on a date with him at Gold Saucer. He may or may not like giving Cloud “gun”.

Don Corneo: Can be enticed to pick a cross dressing Cloud to spend the night with him, and may even try to land a kiss on him.

Rivals

Zack: Basically Cloud!Original version, he got the girl long before Cloud ever got his hands on her.

Fashion Police: Laharl

Sorry, Disgaea, but the time has come to send the Fashion Police into the Netherworld, and their first target is none other than demon Overlord Laharl. Although a flowing scarf can be used to compensate for a multitude of sins, nothing can completely erase Laharl’s crime of fabric (or rather lack of it). Yes, taken on their own the shorts and shoes are not too bad, but when reconciled with the fact that there’s a lot of skin showing and not really much else to the outfit, the time comes to declare that the heat of the Netherworld is nothing compared to looking well turned-out and presentable.

Fashion sense: D

Amusing Search Terms

You toube is back! I feel as if I’ve been reunited with an old friend.

azure alternative: Offering an alternative to Azure Flame- not reading Azure Flame.

pink toube: Only pink videos allowed

romance, words, thoughts: “I love you”

nanoha parodies: Always wanting more parody.

RPG maker beyblade sprites: Once you mention it, Beyblade never fully goes away

Added a new parody movie to the movies s: Did you? Good for you.

rpg maker xp resources blood: Actually, I did work on some blood splatters a while ago.

virtual sex: Let’s all have a good laugh

watch tenchi forever online: I know they mean the film Tenchi Forever, but it amuses me to think that they want the ability to watch Tenchi indefinitely.

techniques to give a gay man pleasure: As I said before, he likes it from behind.

.hack// incest: Also known as Legend of the Twilight.

anime having sex: Anime can have sex now? Is manga its partner?

“foreign demons”: damn those foreign demons.

what is the code for azure flame: Use the secret knock to gain access to our headquarters.

yuri sora festival: What is this?

toki packaging: Packaging for a clock?

great doctor in romance three kingdoms: This makes me think that Doctor Who is going to visit the Three Kingdoms era…actually, that’s not a bad idea.

anime desire angel: Heavenly Pleasure.

touka broken utawarriors: How can Touka be broken?

gundam seed gay: You know the reason Kira never touched Lacus was because he wanted Athrun.

manga art large boobs: Tenjho Tenge.

gay bold: Better than gay italic.

runner: how does this simple one word search reach my blog?

If your sensibilities are not easily offended, you may find Sexy English amusing. A video intended to help Japanese speakers learn slang terms for intercourse and genitalia, it doesn’t show anything explicit, but it should still be considered NSFW.

Oh, and apparently a Tsubasa OVA has been announced. The only hope for it being any good is to not have Bee Train “animate” it (then again, Production I.G.’s Tsubasa movie was hardly stellar).

Bug Master revisited

41 weeks ago, the very first Tuesday Rumble brought us Bug Master, an imaginary edited version of Mushishi. Now we return to expand on that idea with the 4Kids version: Bug Master ~Gotta Catch ‘Em All!

An aspiring young Bug Master, Ginko longs to catch every type of Bug and become the number one Bug Master in the New York league. To that end, every week he travels around the woods and forests of America, meeting up with good American folk and collecting the Bugs he needs to enter the end of series Bug tournament! Thought you already watched “Bug Master”? Think again, because this features all-new dialogue and retooled footage!

Avoiding death: the funniest Yu-Gi-Oh edits

Everyone knows that death and religion don’t exist in America, so they have to be edited out to prevent kids from learning about them. In this article, I don’t even have to make anything up, because we’re about to delve into the dubbed Yu-Gi-Oh archives (without the annoying voices) in order to pick out some of the most hilarious edits.

Original: Kaiba’s father fell (or was he pushed?) out of a window, and didn’t survive the experience.

Edited: Kaiba’s father mysteriously disappeared without a trace.

Original: Yugi and Kaiba play against two opponents on a glass panelled rooftop wired to explode and send whoever loses their life points plummeting to their deaths.

Edited: When the glass panels explode, the loser now falls into the Shadow Realm.

Original: Marik’s father has just whipped Rishid into unconsciousness, causing Dark Marik to emerge and kill his father.

Edited: Marik’s father has just weakened “Odion” with the Millennium Rod off screen, causing Dark Marik to emerge and send his father to the Shadow Realm.

Original: Mai’s parents died when she was young.

Edited: Mai’s parents were never home for some unspecified reason.

Original: Amelda and his brother Miruko live in a war torn country where Gozaburo Kaiba appears to be supplying weapons to both sides. Miruko is killed in an explosion.

Edited: Alistair and Mikey live in an area that has just been bought up by Gozaburo Kaiba. When Kaiba goons try to force them out, Mikey is “taken” (or was that his mother?).

Original: Raphael’s parents and siblings were killed when a tidal wave struck the cruise ship they were on whilst he is marooned on a deserted island. He later digs up his siblings’ skulls in a graveyard.

Edited: Raphael is washed overboard by the tidal wave, and by the time he is rescued from the island, they have forgotten about him (isn’t this crueller?). He digs up an evil duel disk at the graveyard.

Original: Valon beats up some thugs.

Edited: No such beating occurs.

Darker than Black 7

“Thank you for this Pleasure.”

“No problem.”

“I’m very experienced in the ways of Pleasure.”

“…and more importantly, I enjoy myself doing it.”

Dennou Coil 1

“You’re lowering the tone of the show!”

You can’t argue with that.

Sisters of Wellber 3

“No one is more skilled than he is when it comes to Pleasuring a lover with Crossbow.”

“Men have their Crossbows, but we girls prefer Gun!”

“Actually, I’m not familiar with Gun.”

“Looks like his Crossbow isn’t performing up to expectations anyway.”

Random Thoughts: Haseo

Today we chat with Haseo, angsty hero of .hack//Roots and .hack//GU!

Haseo, what made you sign up to The World in the first place?

I know you want me to say I’m a friendless loser with nothing better to do, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. I have a bustling social life- why just last week someone sent me a text message, and it wasn’t even a wrong number! So anyway, yeah, I just wanted to keep up with the latest trends, you know?

Did you ever feel like an idiot, paying to sit around and mope in an MMORPG when you could have just done it in your room for free?

That’s not sitting and moping! It’s introspection, a vital part of character development. I guess not everyone can understand its complexity, though.

How would you answer accusations that your World is ugly and inferior to the original?

You’ve got a lot of nerve even asking me that after featuring me on your Fashion Police section. You people from 2007 just can’t understand the finer points of fashion in my time.

Was there ever anything between you and Tabby?

I can’t deny I like catgirls, but Tabby wasn’t my type- I’m more of a Shino man myself. Although that being said, no man would refuse a close-up of Pai’s assets, am I right?

You went from zero to hero pretty quickly- what was the secret of your success?

Thanks to a clause in my contract, Bee Train weren’t actually allowed to film me during action scenes (some stupid health and safety issue, I think). So all the time I wasn’t on camera, I was actually fighting some really exciting battles and levelling up. I wish you could have seen them, but there’s nothing on record.

And finally, is the sword in your Brandish form trying to compensate for something?

I’m going to hit you in a minute.

This Week in Anime

Strawberries achieve new proportions.

An apple is no match for Ukyo.

After merging with a doughnut company, McDonalds decides to go in for a rebranding.

Watermelon is never far from the screen come the summer.

And here it is in its natural environment.

Anime Awards

Most appreciated animal of the week is the HORSE, which provides Pleasure to many a group of anime heroes.

Most extended exposition scene of the week goes to Seirei no Moribito episode 8, for its lengthy scene with the Evil Men and the Blacksmith. Apparently it was a complex and interesting exploration of the finer uses of exposition, so I must have missed something.

Most HARD GAY episode of the week goes to Koutetsu Sangokushi episode 8, an episode so HARD GAY that it makes the rest of the series look STRAIGHT.

Game World Tour: Phantom Brave

Welcome to the world of Ivoire, a beautiful scattering of islands in a clear blue sea, which has recently entered a time of peace thanks to the defeat of Dark Lord Sulphur. Although conditions in such places as southern Frigidia or the northern deserts may be a little extreme for some, feel free to visit the more temperate central islands. Enjoy the bustling city life in Windmill Promontory, Vapor Island and Bamboo Company, or the quiet villages of Terra Firma, but make sure to take a guide whenever you venture into the wilderness, as monsters abound. We recommend contacting Marona of Phantom Isle if you require assistance in getting around.

OST spotlight: Bakumatsu Kikansetsu Irohanihoheto OST 1

As befits a series set in the Bakumatsu era, the first of Iroha’s two OSTs encapsulates the period feel with its style and instrumentation, but manages to largely avoid those droning themes we tend to associate with Japanese festivals and theatre. Instead, despite an extensive reliance on the series’ prime theme, it manages to create a atmospheric set of tracks with just the right flavour. I’d certainly rate it far above similar OSTs such as SaiMono for its ability to hold worth even outside of the context of the series.

Notable tracks: Shizuku, Doukoku no Haguruma, Shinen no Kousaku, Shannai Kurabu, Shinnen

Mini-editorial: the end of the world as we know it?

Picking up where last week left off, the time has come to question whether the release of a “questionable” anime or manga cause the apocalypse to arrive as the media picks up on it and slams the hotbed of evil that is anime and manga.

Although ideally people would be sensible enough not to tar every piece of Japanese media with the same brush, it would be not unlike the media to sensationalise the “evil of Japanese cartoons” if it got the chance- yet even so, would it magically vanish entirely from the Western world? Video games are constantly being blamed for all kinds of terrible misdeeds, yet they have hardly vanished. Would licensing companies stand idly by and let their profits dry up? Is it common to watch adult titles and then randomly broadcast the fact that “today I watched tentacle demons raping young women! Yay for me!”?

In short, even if anime and manga ends up with negative press attention for a time, it is largely bound to die down as it always does, and whilst it may put off new fans and children still dependent on reactionary parents, many fans will probably carry on largely undeterred.

In Your Reflection

This week we focus on three “stoic dark-hair and easygoing blonde” relationships. First up are Tsubasa Chronicle’s Fye and Kurogane, one a light-hearted mage with a hidden dark side, the other a gruff and committed samurai. Next in line are Ouran’s Honey and Mori, one a laid back lover of sweets with hidden karate skills, the other a quiet “stoic type” who always accompanies him. Finally, we have the newcomers Francisco and Curio, a light-hearted lady-killer who may have further depths, and his extremely dull friend.

Fashion Police: Toya

I won’t deny that Toya is bishie (moreso in the manga), but what were the animators thinking when they dressed him in this? Aside from the bare torso, the choice of colours is questionable and too clashing for its own good, whilst the coat isn’t sure whether it wants to be short or long.

Fashion sense: C-

Amusing Search Terms

What happened to “you toube” again?

Old favourites: hard yaoi, toube pr0n

last exile hentai: “Would you like a ‘ride’ on my ‘vanship’? he whispered in her ear.

Yumizuka Wallpaper: I don’t even know who that is, let alone have a relevant wallpaper.

“futanari lesbians”: This may become an old favourite soon.

“.hack//roots” “OST” “download” “free”: the use of quote marks amused me here.

goku yaoi: Not again.

buso renkin plot: Was it really so complex that you needed to look it up on the internet?

ikkitousen big breast: Booby bombs!

el cazador de la bruja boring: too right it is.

door-to-door salesmen with soda: Forget Pizza Hut, soda is the new in-thing.

soda hime: See, there’s even a princess of soda.

chained up, chained up in the dark: Someone’s looking for bondage ideas.

SHOW EVERY BEYBLADE POWER: I DON’T WANT TO.

“the way” “episode 6″ rpg maker: Wasn’t The Way some religion in Andromeda?

mokkun plushie: Let me know if one exists.

range weapon in rpg maker xp -2003 -2002: When the countdown reaches zero, I want that ranged weapon!

do gay men like three in a bed sessions: better ask some gay men.

games where you can start were you left: It’s called saving, and it’s a really great innovation.

Anime Parodies gay: people actually search for this now?