Azure Flame Reloaded

When Keiichirou Tachibana chucks in a well paid job to become the proprietor of a patisserie, it seems an unlikely move for a man who doesn’t even like sweets that much. Still, his new life is far from uneventful, thanks to his new employees- a chief patissier so gay that he’s been fired from all his jobs for making even straight men fall in love with him, an ex-boxer with a sweet tooth and an overly devoted family friend. But does Tachibana’s sudden desire to deal in confectionaries have something to do with the fact that he was once kidnapped by a man with a strange predilection for delicious cakes?

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With the kidnapping case resolved, the police thank Tachibana.

Yoshioka: Thanks for everything you did, Tachibana- and don’t worry, we won’t reveal your name as a low-life collaborating snitch!

Udagawa: It’s just as well you got there when you did, because after the cake would have come death! That’s how meals usually go, isn’t it?

(Tachibana: Oh, shut up, you minor characters! When am I going to get closure? I’ve wasted eleven episodes of my life in a stupid cake shop just to catch these damned kidnappers!)

Tachibana returns to Antique, where the others are still waiting. Continue Reading »

Tachibana finds himself trapped in yet another Flashback Mode about his kidnapping.

Young Tachibana: Mother, it was awful! And the worst thing wasn’t being taken from my family and forced to live with a strange man- it was eating cakes with strawberries on top!

Back in the present, the two cops plan a stakeout at Antique.

Old Detective: I know it’s the penultimate episode, but I’d like to announce that we habe names! I am now Udagawa, and this young guy is Yoshioka. Continue Reading »

Tachibana has a Flashback Mode about how he escaped his captor by stabbing him in the leg.

Tachibana: I don’t want any more strawberries!

Kidnapper: Wait! Would raspberries have been better?

In the present, Ono presents a new cake.

Eiji: Delicious! A perfect combination of mousse and fruit!

Ono: Er, yes, ‘mousse’… Continue Reading »

It’s a new day at Antique Bakery, and against all odds, Eiji’s fig cake is selling well.

Tachibana: Who would have thought such plain cake would sell this well? All those cooking shows about fine dining have lied to me!

Ono: Well, it’s just like my body- once people get a taste of it, they keep coming back for more.

Whilst Eiji makes more cakes, Tachibana and Ono discuss his future.

Tachibana: So, what do you think? Is he going to become a worthy patissier? Continue Reading »

The episode begins in the home of a female writer as she types up a story; for comedy’s sake, we shall pretend she is a food critic.

(Woman: The meal was absolutely awful. The potatoes were undercooked; I’ve cracked my teeth on softer rocks! And as for the dessert, well, to even call such a lacklustre and watery mixture a dessert is an insult to chefs everywhere.)

Her daughter comes in.

Daughter: Mum, I’m hungry.

Woman: Then go and eat something! Don’t bother me with such trivialities! You know where the fridge, supermarket and ATM machine are, don’t you? Continue Reading »

FMA2 and the seven new deadly sins

With the recent announcement of a second season of Fullmetal Alchemist coinciding with the Pope announcing seven new ‘modern’ deadly sins, it seems only natural that the two should go hand in hand. Could it be that in this new season, Ed and Al will have to battle seven new Homunculi related to these sins?

Pollution: Like a villain from Captain Planet, Pollution’s only aim is to spew noxious and damaging materials into the atmosphere. Wherever Pollution goes, animals die, plants wither and mysterious mutants turn up. Continue Reading »

Despite it being August at the time of airing in the real world, Christmas has arrived in Antique world, and Ono has prepared some special cakes.

Tachibana: Is that white stuff on the cake chocolate?

Ono: Er, no…you’ll find out what that suspicious white liquid is when you taste it…

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Through the magic of television, we’ve jumped ahead to several months after Antique’s opening. Everything is perfect, and everyone is happy.

THE END.

Or not, because a new HARD GAY man is in town, and he’s packing red roses! He enters Antique, and one can almost hear the strains of Bach’s Toccata.

Man: Bonjour, je suis HARD GAY. Continue Reading »

Reviewed this week: Antique Bakery 8, Detroit Metal City 2-3, Gunslinger Girl- Il Teatrino 8, Hidamari Sketch x365 8, Itazura na Kiss 21, Koihime Musou 8-9, Kyouran Kazoku Nikki 18, Love GetChu! 11, Nabari no Ou 20, Natsume Yuujinchou 9-10, Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu 9, Ryoko’s Case File 9, Sisters of Wellber Zwei 5, World Destruction 9-10, Xam’D 8

…and in manga: Doubt 14, Elfen Lied 105, Emma Bangaihen 11-12, Minami-ke 37-9, Sketchbook 19-22, Slayers Revolution 4, xxxHOLiC 164 Continue Reading »