2-H enters the classroom, only to see that the whole place is lit by candles- Sensei is in the shadows.

Chiri: Sensei, what’s going on?

Chiri switches the light on, causing Sensei to rise up and scream.

Sensei: You mustn’t!

Maria: Sensei’s a vampire!

(Meru: Idiot.)

Sensei: Turn that light off! Class, today we must spend the entire day without relying on electricity once! Therefore, IT class is cancelled- we’ll watch an educational movie instead!

Chiri: But to watch the movie we’ll need a TV and DVD player.

Sensei: Zetsubou shita! The culture that relies so much on electricity has left me in despair!

• Can’t use TV, games consoles or computers, among other things.
• Even battery-powered laptops, mobiles and handheld gaming devices will need recharging.
• Forgotten how to cook without oven, hob and microwave.
• Water can only be boiled over a fire.
• DVDs trapped in the player until power returns.
• No lighting at night.

Amatsuki 8

“I may be huge, but this DOG will be Pleasurable.”

Hmm, does that still work these days?

“On top, maybe, but I won’t be your bitch.”

“I desire it that much!”

Amatsuki 9

Toki catches the eye of a potential HARD GAY partner.

“…already skilled in the ways of HARD GAY?”

“Why, when I was young, I barely knew of such things! How times change…”

“It’s just that you’re so damned good-looking!”

“Strip naked and prepared to be spanked!”

“Are you off to the blue light district again?”

“How many times do I have to tell you not to sleep around?”

They aren’t? My education has been sorely lacking.

The most common problem of FOX is highlighted.

Dragons’ Den

Welcome to our regular feature based on the TV program of the same name, in which anime characters try to market their great idea to five fat cats of anime! President Aria made his fortune in the gondola industry of Neo Venezia, and is now CEO of a well-known company. Mikoto started her business in the capital of Wind Bloom, and is now a trusted advisor to the queen, with business partners scattered across the world. The Admiral’s first business venture was to invest in a Chinese restaurant, but a meteor threat to Earth saw her buy shares in ground and space based defence technology, which she currently administers with her protégé “The General” (aka Shogun). Mr Tibbs started his career as a tea cat for the bank, but his sound grasp of finance saw him rise up the ranks until he became one of their most prominent managers. Finally, The Cardinal is the world’s most powerful fat cat, with a wide range of business interests that ensure that he has a paw in every pie (often literally, depending on his appetite). These five cats represent some heavyweight investment clout in every sense of the word, but is any deal attractive enough to get them to roll off their backsides and shake paws with a budding entrepreneur?

This week in the Den we have Haru and Kurama, who are here to pitch a revolutionary new form of the internet known as “The Metal”. Will the Dragons jump at the chance to be at the forefront of this technological revolution?

Kurama: Hello everyone, I’m Kurama, this is Haru, and we’re here today to pitch for investment in a brand new technological development called the Meta-Real, or Metal for short. Basically, what it allows you to do is dive into a virtual reality tailored to your choice.

Cardinal: Been there, done that.

Kurama: Ah, but this is different. Allow me to play a short video.

Kurama shows a video of the ocean-like nature of the Metal.

Aria: Punyu? [Why does it look like an ocean?]

Kurama: Well, uh, no one knows, really. But dogs have their own Metal, so presumably fat cats could too.

Mikoto: We are not fat!

Admiral: I have to admit that swimming around in a virtual ocean seems a bit too much like hard work to me- I’m out.

Kurama: But the possibilities are endless, like wish fulfilment, virtual sex and er, multiple orgasms.

Aria: Punyu! [There’s no way I can attach my name to such a seedy practice- I’m out.]

Mr Tibbs: Tell me, what sort of equipment do you need to connect to the Metal?

Kurama: Well, like Haru here, you can get yourself a cyberbrain- or you can use a special diving bell type apparatus.

Mr Tibbs: Could you tell me a little more about these cyberbrains? Would they let me log onto the bank directly?

Kurama: Yes, but you’d run the risk of having your brain hacked or your spare CPU cycles put to use by unscrupulous companies.

Mr Tibbs: Well, I have to admit that I’m unwilling to invest until those security risks are worked out, so I’m out.

Cardinal: I must admit that while I’m interested in virtual realities in general, this one does seem a little convoluted for my tastes. I understand that you were trying to be different, but I think it’s backfired- when I go online I want to relax, not literally go diving.

It seems as if the Metal isn’t a big hit in the Den- the Dragons have seen better virtual realities already. Kurama and Haru will have to leave emptyhanded.

Anime Big Brother

Maki settles into his room in the Big Brother house.

Aoki: Hey, Maki, did you bring your women’s clothes? I was hoping we could have a little dress up session later.

Maki: I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Aoki: Yes you do, don’t you remember?

Maki: Shut up, Aoki!

Meanwhile, in the living room…

Allison: I love you, Wil!

Wil: Eh? Oh, that’s nice. Do you like my sweater?

Kuu-chan: Is dinner ready yet? I’m starving.

Lawrence: I’ll sell you these apples for three Thoreni silver coins.

Horo: Get away from those apples! They’re mine!

Doumeki: Watanuki, everyone’s getting hungry.

Watanuki: And I suppose you’re going to say it’s my turn to cook again? Honestly, I don’t know why I put up with this.

Doumeki: Don’t forget your apron.

Watanuki: Thanks- hey, wait a minute!

This Week in Anime

See what happens to oranges stored in the fridge.

Aagh, tangerines are taking over her brain!

Natsume Yuujinchou supports peaches!

Beyblade spotted on Wagaya no Oinari-sama.

Could this be the fruit invasion that we’ve dreaded for so long?

Agreed- that’s not suspicious at all.

Nice boat!

Tsubasa Chronicle, soon to be renamed Apple Chronicle.

Men, be sure to name your ‘weapon’ for a better Gun experience.

“You’ll use your right hand for the actual Hyper Self Pleasure.”

“This Hyper Self Pleasure isn’t working!”

Liang or Ezo, they all come under the same heading in the end.

“You’d think she’d have given up by now.”

I hate logos, images, icons and avatars! Put an end to them all!

“It’s not like we have time for full Pleasure right now.”

Pinocchio admits he’s more comfortable in the HARD GAY scene.

Anime World Tour: Chocolate Underground

Welcome to a world where voter apathy has caused the super healthy to take power! Don’t worry about sweets- chocolate, vanilla, honey and various other confections are banned, ensuring that all you’ll have to eat is a tasteless mush! You can also enjoy daily adverts and health bulletins, all of which are compulsory to ensure that you don’t accidentally miss them and regret it later! And don’t worry about rumours of secret underground facilities where they force you to eat hideous chocolate- the police are already seeking them out to make your world a safer and more tasteless place.

Reverse Harem of the week: Ange (Koi Suru Tenshi Angelique)

Other heroines may have had to make do with seven or eight bishounen, but Ange netted no fewer than nine protectors in her plot-free adventure.

Harem

Marcel: Obligatory blonde shota.

Olivie: Cross-dresser with a taste in Victorian-style fashions and bi-coloured hair.

Randy: Hot-headed, honest and open type.

Zephel: ‘Cool’ punk warrior type, becomes angered when he realises he doesn’t have a destined HARD GAY partner.

Luva: Quiet book lover; spends his days researching HARD GAY in the library.

Clavis: Calm and collected type with a semi-tragic past.

Oscar: Knight type with a fondness for HORSE.

Lumiel: Musician with HARD GAY ties to Clavis.

Julius: Blonde princely type.

Arios: Not a destined bishounen, but a wandering swordsman who randomly turns up later in the series.

(UK readers, a new series of the real Dragons’ Den begins next Monday at 9pm on BBC2.)

Welcome to our regular feature based on the TV program of the same name, in which anime characters try to market their great idea to five fat cats of anime! President Aria made his fortune in the gondola industry of Neo Venezia, and is now CEO of a well-known company. Mikoto started her business in the capital of Wind Bloom, and is now a trusted advisor to the queen, with business partners scattered across the world. The Admiral’s first business venture was to invest in a Chinese restaurant, but a meteor threat to Earth saw her buy shares in ground and space based defence technology, which she currently administers with her protégé “The General” (aka Shogun). Mr Tibbs started his career as a tea cat for the bank, but his sound grasp of finance saw him rise up the ranks until he became one of their most prominent managers. Finally, The Cardinal is the world’s most powerful fat cat, with a wide range of business interests that ensure that he has a paw in every pie (often literally, depending on his appetite). These five cats represent some heavyweight investment clout in every sense of the word, but is any deal attractive enough to get them to roll off their backsides and shake paws with a budding entrepreneur?

Making his way to the Den today are Himitsu’s Aoki and Maki, who are here in an attempt to franchise the device used at their workplace- the MRI scanner! Will the Dragons be interested in this revolutionary new application of the technology that enables the user to probe the minds of the dead?

Aoki: Hello, I’m Aoki-

Maki: Shut up, Aoki- let me do the talking. My name is Maki, and I’m here to pitch for investment in our new franchise centred on the MRI scanner. With this device, we can scan the brains of the dead and see the same images they did.

Mr Tibbs: Can I just ask you something- why are you dressed as a woman?

Maki: Er, it’s for a mission.

Aoki: Hey, I thought you said it was for a special treat later.

Maki: For the last time, Aoki, shut up!

Cardinal: The good thing about the dead is that they can’t reveal my secrets, er, I mean any crucial secrets. I most certainly won’t be investing in this.

Aria: Punyu? [Could you perhaps explain the science behind this? I don’t really understand how magnetic resonance imaging lets you see the thoughts of the dead.]

Aoki: Well, uh, neither do we-

Maki: That’s a trade secret! Look, is no one interested in seeing through the eyes of a dead person?

Mikoto: Well, no one ever dies in Mai-Otome- no one important, anyway- so it doesn’t make much difference. I’m out.

Dodgy science and a lack of application have lost most of the Dragons already. Will Maki and Aoki be able to rekindle their interest?

Admiral: So, you’re looking to sell this as a franchise?

Maki: That’s right- you pay us large wads of cash, and then we give you your own kit to start scanning dead brain.

Admiral: And how will the franchisee actually make a profit?

Maki: That’s up to them- we can’t be expected to think of everything!

Admiral: Well, I think I speak for all of us when we say that you’re sloppy, unprepared and unimpressive- I’m out.

Mr Tibbs: Maybe if you ditch Aoki, dress like a man and get a solid business plan, I’d be tempted to invest, but until then, I’m out.

It’s a disaster in the Den for Aoki and Maki, who will have to return to their day job at Section Nine- and no, that’s not the Section Nine with the lovely Ms Motoko Kusanagi.

Amatsuki 7

Kuchiha suggests STRAIGHT with a splash of DOG.

“Everyone knows that boys sleep with other boys.”

“Fine, go and be HARD GAY with your boyfriend!”

“I just can’t bear the thought of turning STRAIGHT!”

“Well, couldn’t we at least try some BI?”

“Now, let’s wash away all talk of STRAIGHT and BI with some good old HARD GAY.”

Don’t you just love moments like these, especially if they’re in slow-motion?

“What kind of rough HARD GAY is that?”

“You were the one who told me to get into it!”

Anime Big Brother

Big Brother: The time has come for me to read out the nominations for eviction. For being too stupid, we have Wil and Aoki; for being too stoic, Doumeki and for threatening to devour all the housemates, we have Heat. One of you will be leaving at the end of this paragraph, but for now, would you like to share a few words with your audience?

Doumeki: You can’t evict me without Watanuki- who will cook my lunch?

Watanuki: Why, you-!

Wil: I’m not stupid, I’m top of my class!

Allison: Then why can’t you tell I’m in love with you?

Wil: Sorry, Allison, did you say something?

Aoki: Oh, I’m up for eviction- oh well, back to the crossword. Hmm, three letters- “four legged animal that goes ‘moo’”. There’s a ‘C’ at the beginning- any ideas?

Heat: Shut up! I’ll devour you all!

Big Brother: Thank you. And now, the housemate who will be leaving is….Heat!

Heat transforms into Agni, roars and beats his chest.

Big Brother: In Heat’s place, the next person to join the Big Brother house is Maki from Himitsu! Look forward to it!

(Aoki: It’s as good as Sister, but hopefully he’ll bring his cross-dressing kit.)

This Week in Anime

Is that some kind of apple in the bottom left hand corner?

“NOOO!!! Don’t turn us into juice!”

We learn how the rubber duck came to the Hidamari Apartments.

Take note here, because these represent the strawberry cakes of doom that appear in Antique Bakery.

“All hail Tequila, our new god!”

Healthy cigarettes…

…amazing make-up…

…is there nothing these products can’t do?

Tomatoes are caught lounging on the vine.

Handling four Zhuge Liangs can be exhausting.

“HARD YURI only from here on.”

An epic tale of a boy with a monkey tail who gains shinigami powers and uses them to found his own pirate crew.

“But don’t worry- it’ll be pleasurable.”

Hey, who’s been eating the watermelon?

Here we see the legendary apple shrine.

Banana overload!

Mmm, tasty.

Aagh, a rubber duck of doom is floating silently towards you! Get out of there!

Faceless returns.

“You saw the legendary Golden Wang?”

Classic PC games: Alley Cat

As a cat lover, the chance to play as a cat couldn’t be passed up, even if it meant turning to a rather inferior and frustrating game. You take on the role of the titular alley cat, and your first goal is to avoid being eaten by dogs by jumping onto the dustbins on your street. From there, you must avoid more obstacles try to get into an open window, wherein a mini-game will commence within the rooms. These games usually involve avoiding more dangers, with one in particular requiring you to collect fish underwater without running out of air. Once the game is over, you get chucked outside again, but persevere and you might just find love with a lady cat. The graphics are simplistic, the game frustrating, but Alley Cat is nonetheless one of those titles that stick in the mind just for sheer effort.

In Your Reflection

In the latest of the increasingly rare head-to-heads, we compare Renton and Eureka from Eureka Seven with Seikichi and Sora from Oh! Edo Rocket. In both cases, we have a hot-headed and determined young man who defies the authorities, and the mysterious female love interest with a very special secret.

The Stylus of Life

Nintendo DS owners will be more than familiar with using the stylus to manipulate objects on the touch screen, but here at Azure Flame, we’ve taken things one step further- with the Stylus of Life! No longer need you be restricted to virtual situations, because the Stylus of Life can let you manipulate the real world! Scrub out things you don’t like, draw new things that you’d rather have in their place, move friends and generics as you wish- all with the Stylus of Life! You can use it to cook, clean, even empty the cat litter tray! Everyday chores become a breeze with the Stylus of Life!

Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei: the lost chapters

Sensei enters the classroom.

Sensei: Okay, class, let’s get started.

Chie arrives.

Chie: Itoshiki-sensei, I need to see proof of your ID before you start teaching these children.

Sensei: But you know who I am! We’ve been working together for months.

Chie: I’m sorry, but without ID nothing is certain.

Sensei: Zetsubou shita! The society that constantly needs identification for everything has left me in despair!

• Need a passport to get a driving licence, job, bank account, criminal record check.
• Need a birth certificate to get a passport.
• Proof of ID required when entering any club, TV studio, etc.
• Need to get a professional to confirm your ID photo- amateurs don’t count.
• You can’t get a credit card without sufficient ID, but a dog can.
• Still need parents’ details even when in your 20s.

Majin Tantei Nogami Neuro

“Shouldn’t someone have told them that the world was still there?”

These remind me of something- if only I could place what…

“Gwakaka, I’m so obviously evil that I’m probably not evil at all!”

“Even cats aren’t that lazy!”

“I bought these from the Jewellery Channel!”

Uh, yes…

Spice and Wolf 7

Horo inspects a case of apples to see if they are worthy enough for anime cameos.

Horo and Lawrence discuss their policy on Liangs.

“Now that I have a Pleasure partner, there’s no stopping me!”

“You’ll need it if you’re going to be doing it outside.”

“Those apples never stood a chance.”

Anime Big Brother

Our housemates have settled in, but will tempers fray thanks to their extended proximity?

Lawrence: So, if I buy a fur for ten Thoreni silver coins, and sell it for twenty, how much profit have I made?

Aoki tries to count on his fingers, but gets confused.

Aoki: Uh, can we go back to the basics? I’m still not confident with numbers.

Horo: And you say you have a job on the outside?

Lelouch: I wouldn’t be too sure of that- I tried to use my Geass on him but there’s not enough brain in there for it to work.

Doumeki: Hey, Watanuki, is lunch done yet?

Watanuki: Shut up! Why does no one ever help me in the kitchen?

Heat: Hurry up with that meal, or I might just devour you all!

Meanwhile, Allison is with Wil.

Allison: Come on, Wil, let’s take a shower together!

Wil: Would that really be appropriate?

Allison: How am I ever going to get it through your thick head that I love you?

Wil: Hmm? Did you say something?

Big Brother: Housemates, next week one of you is going to be evicted. Readers, vote in the poll to decide who should go.

This Week in Anime

Zetsubou shita! The society that loves railroads has left me in despair!

“Gwakaka, everything’s going to plan! I even have a special chair!”

Zetsubou shita!

Bananas are one thing, but flying bananas?

Stupid filler weapon redux.

“Oh god, not those stalkers again.”

One day, I’m going to be a Broaoway star.

“Damn, they caught me in the middle of my Star Trek cosplay!”

“Yeah, but I got fed up with mah-jong.”

“Wait, is this like Pokemon?”

“No HARD GAY, nothing!”

“You have no right to hold my Zhuge Liang!”

“…Holland!”

Classic PC games: Return of the Mutant Space Bats of Doom

Having promised to talk about this a few weeks ago, I completely forgot about it until the other day, perhaps an indication that this game hasn’t captured my heart in the way the original did. Although much the same in that you shoot down wave upon wave of attacking bats, the graphics have been overhauled, there are new weapons in the form of the Zapper and Rotospike, and various other tweaks to the system. Personally, I find the first game more graphically appealing, but if you’ve played that to death then this is a good way to get another dose of retro action.

Harem of the week: Felt (Atelier Iris 2)

Although he was supposed to be travelling to the world of Belkhyde to find a way to save his home of Eden, Felt somehow proved adept in picking up girls along the way.

Harem

Viese: A fellow orphan and childhood friend of Felt- has deeper feelings which Felt has yet to notice.

Noin: An outspoken hothead who Felt meets when he first comes to Belkhyde.

Fee: A cool young woman with a hidden heritage.

Yuveria:A holographic projection that appears to Felt in the workshops due to his destined status.

Crest/Banner of the Stars: the game

Can’t get enough of the Seikai universe? Then why not take control of it yourself, as the commander of the Abh Fleet? With Abh forces at your command, planets to conquer, resources to mine and the United Mankind to defeat, there’s plenty to do in this sci-fi tactical simulation. Go online and challenge other empires, or play against the computer and ensure peace in the galaxy. Commission the building of customised attack squadrons, keep planetary populations happy or just run roughshod over their wishes and risk rebellion- the power is in your hands!

Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei: the lost chapters

Sensei: Class, I don’t have a lesson plan today, so I’m just going to improvise. Everyone, get out your text books and start studying.

Chiri: Wait, you can’t do that- everything has to be done just right. Start by calling the register, then have us get our textbooks out and read!

Sensei: But it’s improvisation! It doesn’t matter how I do it.

Chiri: Even improvisation needs to have rules or everything will end up in chaos!

Sensei: Zetsubou shita! The society that imposes rules on improvisation has left me in despair!

• Strict rules for improvisation in Indian music.
• Lessons required for ‘freestyle’ dancing.
• Ad-libbing actors still having to be aware of what they’re saying.
• Unable to use any old lie when making an excuse.
• Examiners still looking for specific things after allowing students to write about whatever they want.

Wagaya no Oinari-sama 6

“…having HARD YURI.”

“Pretending to be a HARD YURI expert when I’m just as much of a beginner.”

“Are you trying to say she’s really a man?”

Yes, because we Westerners are known for just getting naked anywhere and everywhere.

What is this, Pokemon?

Toshokan Sensou 7

“Are you worthy of glimpsing my Zhuge Liang?”

Fruit sighted!

“I don’t know- get me to a bathroom quick!”

The Jintarou Kyle Show

Kyle: Hello and welcome to another edition of the Jintarou Kyle Show! This week’s topic is “Forced to pilot a giant robot…even though I’m only in junior high!” So let’s have our first guest on the show- Shinji Ikari!

Shinji emerges and sit down.

Kyle: Shinji, am I right in thinking that you were asked to pilot a giant robot at the age of only fourteen?

Shinji: That’s right- my dad asked me to do it.

Kyle: So, at an age where most boys are worrying about girls, sports and hanging out with their mates, your own father is pressuring you to get inside a giant robot and fight? That’s disgraceful!

Shinji: Well, I wanted my dad to notice me- I didn’t know how else to get his attention.

Kyle: That sounds like a cry for help to me- so let’s get Gendou Ikari on the show!

Gendou enters as the audience boos.

Kyle: Gendou, is it true that you made your own son go out and fight for the future of humanity?

Gendou: That’s right- I did it, and I’d do it again.

Kyle: Well, I think it’s disgraceful! You told our researchers that you didn’t even want to spend time with the boy- that you’d rather let him live alone than come and stay with you. This is a fourteen year old boy crying out for your love and attention, and you have just pushed him aside!

The audience claps and cheers.

Shinji: No, it’s really not all that bad- I have Misato…

Kyle: The poor boy is even too scared to confront you about it! Shall I tell you what he said to our researchers? He said that he feels too worthless and scared to even want to commit suicide!

Gendou: I-I had no idea. Son, you never told me this!

Kyle: This boy needs his father. I never said it was going to be easy to rebuild your relationship, but our show psychologist can help you work through your issues. Ladies and gentlemen- Shinji and Gendou!

Shinji and Gendou get up and leave the stage together.

Kyle: Next on the show we’ll be talking to Ayato Kamina, who was forced to leave the only life he’d ever known and live on a remote island as the pilot of the RahXephon. Stay tuned, because that’s coming after the break.

Anime Big Brother

The housemates have entered the Big Brother house, but how are they doing? Let’s check up on them.

Morning

Watanuki is the first up- he starts cooking everyone breakfast.

Doumeki: Don’t forget to make those spring rolls I like!

Watanuki: Shut up! I don’t do everything for you! Oh, if only Himawari-chan was here!

Everyone comes down for breakfast, but Horo and Kuu-chan start arguing over who gets the last apple.

Kuu-chan: Hands off that apple!

Horo: No fox is going to tell Horo the Wise what to do!

Lawrence: I have a business proposition- why don’t you split the apple 50-50?

Horo: You’re such a softie- can’t you see that with people like her you have to drive a hard bargain? I demand at least 70% of the apple!

Heat: If you guys don’t shut up, I’ll devour both of you!

(Lelouch: I could command them to shut up, but I must not waste my Geass on such a trivial thing.)

After the first day of ups and downs, our housemates are called in to talk to Big Brother.

Big Brother: So, Wil, how’s it going?

Wil: Well, things aren’t too bad, but I feel like Allison is trying to tell me something- this morning I found her in my bed with all her clothes stripped off! I don’t know what that’s all about.

Next, Big Brother has some sad news for Aoki.

Big Brother: Aoki, we have some sad news for you- your father has just died.

Aoki: Oh. Oh well, back to the house- I’m on dinner duty tonight.

Readers, you decide! Who should be evicted? Who should enter the house to take their place? Suggestions below.

This Week in Anime

Kogarashi presents new “Apple A Day” initiative.

I feel like I’m watching The Jewellery Channel. Oh, and did you know that amethyst is derived from the Greek word ‘amethystos’, meaning ‘not drunken’, because it was believed that wearing amethyst could stop you from getting drunk*? (*don’t try this at home).

Helth brand cigarettes, for a healthier cigarette.

“Such extremes of Hyper Self Pleasure!”

“Pears! Get your pears here!”

“Mmm, delicious!”

“Weaklings- can’t even hold their pears.”

“Damn, that guy is eyeing up my pears.”

“Gwakaka, he left his pears unguarded! Now’s my chance!”

If you didn’t fancy that amethyst earring, how about this oval cut loose sapphire?

I’m sorry, but of all filler weapons, this has to be one of the most stupid.

“We know that monkeys are traditionally regarded as banana lovers, but we have many other fruit to offer.”

Satoru pays for the latest session of phone sex.

The pears return- with apples on their side!

Flash Game Review: Lego Indiana Jones

Forget the disappointment of the film and try a demo of the best thing to come out of the Indy franchise- Lego Indiana Jones. This four level Flash game lets you control Indy for some side-scrolling action- hover the cursor over coins and treasure to pick them up, and click on flashing red hazards in time to dodge, jump over or otherwise avoid them. It sounds simple enough, but it actually requires decent reflexes and good timing- although luckily it’s addictive enough to make you want to complete trying until the level is mastered. After all, you have to clear levels 1-2 just to get the point where you can have Lego Indy ride on a cute Lego horse!

Harem of the week: Klein (Atelier Iris)

He may have seemed like a straightforward alchemist, but beneath it all, Klein had an eye for the ladies- after all, he could always wow them with his ‘staff’.

Harem

Lita: The female lead and main love interest- a strong-willed tsundere with a unique secret.

Norn: a youthful catgirl with a pure and innocent love for Klein.

Viola: apathetic proprietor of the local magic store- can Klein make her care about life again?

Blair: A proud young woman who opens a bakery after falling on hard times.

Hute and Villa: A pair of forward and outspoken sisters.

Arlin: A male party member who enjoys practising ‘swordplay’ with Klein.